The Woman In The Palace

He's not coming back for you

"Do you still think about him?" Yuan asked. "Even as I look at you right now. I could tell your mind is consumed by the thoughts of him. I'm not a fool, Jasmine." He pressed his soft lips against my head and inhaled my scent deep inside his nostrils. "Only a blind person can't see the love and affection you have for him. Even when you were married to Hoon, you're desire for my little brother announced itself loudly."

I looked at Yuan wide eyed. Wide eyed without fear. As the last couple weeks passed, Yuan had kept to his words about his attempt to be a good father, and a better person for the sake of the baby. I know it's only natural for any parent to want to be a better person for their child, but Yuan made all these changes to himself that he's a totally different person only after a short time.

I still convinced myself not to trust it.

"I don't think about him." I lied. Prince Julong ravaged my mind constantly. Not only because I cared for him and feared for his safety each day he's in the battle field, but I also must let him know about this baby.

Yuan stroked my hair gently, as he allowed the silkiness of my hair fell through and in between his long elegant fingers. "Don't you think I know?"

Every muscle in my body tensed and I prepared myself for his hands to bite on my neck or clamp on my arms as he normally would when I displeased him. But it didn't come. Yuan remained gentle with me, even though fear still struck me raw and fierce.

"What do you mean, your highness." I said stiffly, unable to hide the fret in my tensed voice.

"That Julong is the father." He stroked my hair again and pressed his lips atop my head.

We sat on the bench by the garden surrounded by the sweat scent of the flowers in bloom in the middle of this perfect autumn night. The sky was clear, and the stars smiled at us with agreement. Yuan guided my chin to look at the stars.

They were fantastic.

"I knew I can't have any children, and how far along you are in your pregnancy fell perfectly in tune when he came home. My intention was for him to get princess Yu Yan pregnant, but he got you pregnant instead."

I could laugh at the thought but decided to hold it. Yuan might not find it so funny as I did.

"I seized the opportunity, Jasmine. Julong is still my blood, he is my brother and the baby is his child. That child would be entitled to the throne no matter what."

"Unless wangfei Yu Yan got pregnant." I added.

"Unless Yu Yan got pregnant." He parroted.

"But not since I claimed that child as mine."

I still don't know what he's getting at. I found myself breaking with sweat and being pregnant meant I suffered from higher temperature as well. My skin turned cold and clammy, but emperor Yuan coaxed me to calm down. His heavy arms coiled and wrapped around resting them at the top of my belly.

"Jasmine." His tender voice lingered in my ear.

"Hmmmm.....?"

"Julong had been fighting for a while. Eversince he was little his mind had been in the military, war, and strategies. That was his innate gift, it came naturally for Julong more than any of us. I'm almost a decade and a half older than him, and I was already a teenager when he was born but I saw it as he grew up. Julong loved the idea of fighting, it's evident on the way he thought, spoke, and even his built was honed naturally of a natural born warrior."

I found myself sighing deeply as I reminiscent those times when I saw prince Julong after his morning combat practice gleaming in sweat, sending all those concubines at the garden swooning all over him. A smile jumped on my lips and I was glad it's dark and my face is hidden away from the emperor that I didn't have to conceal my heavy blush and smile.

"Jasmine, Julong loves what he's doing out there and I'm not sure if he's even going to be the same person when he gets back – if he even comes back.

Don't say that. Please don't say that. Don't say that Julong will not come back.

Emperor flipped me over gently so I now faced him. He stared at me deeply in the eyes. His dark onyx eyes shone brightly and as beautiful as the brightest star tonight. "

"Yuan?"

"I think I found myself caring enough for you that I want to make you my wife. Forget about how I acted before. I was ruthless, and I was made that way by years of pressure to become an emperor, but now that I am, I think I can relax. Plus, I also want to give our son a proper claim to the throne."

I was speechless.

The emperor's gentle grip that was on my arms moved to my waist, he pulled me to his warm chest and allowed our bodies to press together. He loosened a deep breath and I prepared myself for more of confessions this evening. "You have to understand, you are my concubine. No man wants a woman who's being used by someone else. I'm sure Julong would prefer a woman who doesn't belong to someone else. He will not come for you, forget about him, Jasmine."

It's harsh and it's true and it also broke my heart.

My eyes welled up angry at him, angry at myself. The thought danced way too many times in my mind before and I considered it to be the reason why prince Julong had not bothered to come see me even after that day we consummated our love.

He promised to take me away, he promised to run away together. He promised to never break my heart and love me forever even as I wait here owned by someone else. My heart belonged to him, only him.

Yuan dried my tears that I fought and held from streaming my face, but the truth struck me like an axe dropped in my chest. It hurts, and he was right. "Why would Julong want a woman like me?"