So Comes Snow After Fire

21.iii

Thorin was not surprised when, after the evening meal, Kíli asked to speak with him privately. Earlier in the day, Dwalin had off-handedly asked if Thorin had spoken to his nephew, though regarding what, the stern warrior had not specified. Thorin might not have thought any more of the matter, had he not noticed over dinner that Kíli seemed especially restless.

Now, in an empty parlor in the royal suite, Kíli was unguarded enough that Thorin could easily tell his nephew had not been this unsettled since that first sacrifice of Tauriel nearly two months earlier. He knew Kíli had been suffering Tauriel's loss since then, but it seemed something new distressed him now.

"Thorin, I don't know what to do," Kíli said as soon as the door had shut behind them. His furrowed brow clearly reflected his indecision.

"How so?" Thorin prompted. Not knowing what to do was seldom Kíli's problem; the impetuous young man usually seemed quite sure of what he wanted, whether or not his desire was one that could (or should) be followed. Thorin wondered if the truth were no different in this case.

"Audha refused me," Kíli said, watching his uncle keenly.

"Did she, now." The news was unexpected, but not, in fact, disastrous.

"I didn't ask her to do this," Kíli protested desperately.

"I know you did not," Thorin assured him. Kíli's dilemma was perfectly clear now: he wanted to return to his first love, yet felt that doing so would betray his word.

"Did Audha give a reason?" Thorin asked.

"She says I ought to be with Tauriel," Kíli admitted, sounding almost guilty.

"That, at least, does not surprise me."

"What?" Kíli's raised brows indicated that it surely had surprised him.

Thorin almost smiled at the knowledge that he had noticed what his nephew had not. "Oh, I did not foresee that she would turn you down, but... She seemed quite taken with the idea that your mother married for love and got two honorable sons out of the match."

"What should I do? Our marriage was the condition for securing her father's vote."

"I don't suppose there is much you can do if she won't have you," Thorin said thoughtfully. "The vote cannot be changed, and you've held true to your side of the agreement. I should think the far greater scandal would be for her father to defy the Khazad's eldest laws and traditions and force her to have you against her will."

Kíli swallowed, his face impassive as if he did not yet dare to hope. "You don't think..." he began. "I swore before the Council to take a dwarven bride, but I can't bear the thought. Would it be permissible for me to remain unwed?"

Thorin studied his nephew, impressed and not a little surprised that Kíli did not yet ask to be allowed to return to Tauriel, when it was quite certain he wanted nothing else. Was Kíli still afraid of endangering his brother's position by pursuing her?

"I don't mean to ask you to marry. You've already made your point to the Council," Thorin said.

Kíli nodded, the tension relaxing perceptibly from the set of his shoulders. "Thank you." His expression was still subdued, but for the first time in months, the desperation was gone from his eyes.

You've said nothing of Tauriel, Thorin was about to say, and then stopped himself. If he had been the only one who would have to defend Kíli's marriage to an elf, he would offer Kíli his sanction here and now. He had been sure for some time that Kíli deserved her and that losing her had broken his heart. Let the other clans complain and be damned; Thorin was ready to argue that he saw the good of his kin and kingdom more clearly than they.

But Kíli was not only Thorin's heir; he would be Fíli's heir, as well, not only until such time as Fíli had sons of his own, but afterwards, should Fíli's line falter. Thus it would not be fair to leave Fíli the difficulty of defending his brother's unconventional marriage without Fíli's own knowledge and consent. Almost certainly Fíli would support his brother in this, as he did in nearly every other case; yet Thorin knew it was right that he speak to Fíli first.

"We can announce Audha's refusal at the next meeting of my council," was all Thorin said. "The news will travel fast enough from there."

Kíli said, "Dwalin witnessed her return of my betrothal gift."

So that was how their cousin had known of this development. "I'll make sure he is present," Thorin affirmed.

"Thank you, Uncle," Kíli said again, and then after a few moments' silence, moved for the door.

Thorin caught Kíli's shoulder as he passed. "You needn't thank me, lad," he said. "I know I've done many things wrong, but I have always wanted good for you."

"I know," Kíli answered and returned his uncle's embrace.