My brother's best friend

Chapter Thirty-One

I watch as everyone moves around and get things ready. Amanda commands and tells everyone what to do. Taylor and Tyler hurry around doing as their mother asks. I am off the hook since I am heading to Taylor's bedroom to breastfeed Aiden. He's been more hungry these days. I read up on it and it seems to be normal at this stage. 

He gurgles when I smile down at him, a smile in his lips. My heart swells as I watch him. He smiled for the first time two days ago and has been smiling non-stop since. I bet Daniel will be happy to see it. 

Daniel only stayed the weekend before returning to his project on Monday. We didn't talk much. Maybe it was the fact that we both were not well-rested, it happened more than once that we both would get to Aiden's room when he cried. We didn't say much then either. 

I don't know why he didn't talk to me, but I know I felt horrible for losing it Friday night. The way he looked at me the next few days told me my pillow crying wasn't unheard. The pity and sadness clouded his blue eyes for the rest of the weekend. And it just added to me feeling more horrible. 

Since then, I went by the studio once a week, just to talk to other people. Everyone loves Aiden. Some of the other mothers gave me tips and tricks that will come in handy soon. When I researched how I was feeling they suggested a few new clothing pieces and to compliment myself every day. It's been working for the most part.  

There's a knock on the door just as I finish up. "Daniel will be here soon." It's Taylor. She's still been helping out, but I could tell it was getting to her. "I'll be right down." I call. After taking a deep breath and looking at myself in the mirror I head downstairs with Aiden, cradled in my arms, to wait for Daniel. 

Today is a big day. Daniel is 25 today. Amanda is constantly almost in tears when she's not ordering everyone around that is. Dwayne and the boys don't seem to care that much. Neither does Taylor. And if I'm right neither will Daniel. But Abby had come up with the idea of having a 25th birthday lunch for Daniel. 

I glance at the table where everyone stacked their gifts. I zone in on the silver gift bag standing at the end of the table. I think back to how angry I have been with him and how I struggled to get a gift. But I finally got it. 

I look out the window and smile, "Look, my love, daddy's here." Amanda claps her hands as she calls everyone to attention. I sit down next to Abby. Not by choice. Aiden gurgles at me and I send him kisses and tickle him slightly. 

The door swings open and Will comes in, followed by Daniel. "Happy birthday!" Abby yells, jumping to her feet. Everyone follows and Aiden starts crying. I try to hush him, but he just keeps on crying. "I'm so sorry, it's my fault." Abby says somewhere. 

In a second Daniel is next to me, "Let me." Daniel takes him and for a moment he stops crying, only to focus on Daniel. Then a new scream erupts from our son. I take him back and before I can stop myself I snap, "This is why you need to bee here. He doesn't know you. By now he had to know your face, but you decided to leave." After the words left my mouth I feel regret sink in. 

"I'm sorry." I whisper. He shakes his head, "You're right." Aiden finally settles down after I rocked him back and forth. "Let's eat." Will says, half walking to the dining table. Amanda agrees and everyone gets seated at the table. I put Aiden in his stroller, and turn on the mobile. 

During the lunch, I watch as Abby laughs and giggles with  Daniel. I can also tell that this is too much for him. He'd rather not have anything done on his birthday. He's been saying that since he was 15. It's been 10 years and no one has listened. 

After lunch, I check on Aiden and find him fast asleep in the stroller. Everyone moves to the living room. Levi comes to fetch the gifts. I grab the silver bag. Levi frowns at me. I shake my head, "I want to give it to him." I follow them out the room, the baby monitor strapped to my jeans as Daniel did a few weeks ago. 

Daniel starts opening gifts. Most of the things are small but expensive. Abby gave him a very fancy watch which I am pretty sure he won't be wearing anytime soon. "Was that all?" He asks. I hold out the silver packet to him. He smiles up at me. My heart flutters. But I force it down. 

I wait for him to open it. Everyone seems to disappear as he pulls out a thin silver frame, three pictures looking back at him from behind their glass cage. One of Aiden and Daniel, in black and white. A pretty good photo taken a few days after he told me he was leaving for two months. The second is of Aiden, in his crib two days ago, smiling. The last one is the picture he gave me in the photo album of Aiden and me. 

"I didn't know what picture to put in there." I point to the last one, "You can change it if you want." He shakes his head and looks up at me, "It's perfect. Thank you." He rises to his feet and kisses my cheek. Gosh, how I wish things were different. But they're not. 

"Come on, let's put on your new watch." Abby chirps, pulling him down next to her on the couch. I look away when she leans over and kisses him. I look down at the monitor. It flashes red and Aiden's cry comes over the electronic device. I excuse myself and head to my son. 

I pick him up and rock him back and forth. I watch them through the door. They look like a family. All of them. I look down at my baby boy, his blue eyes sparkling as he smiles at me. "You are my family, my love."