A poem about purging

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I don't have an official eating disorder.
I could escape this.
Start eating again, stop throwing up.
I could run away.
I could escape before it gets too bad.
I should escape before in gets too bad.
So what if I never have a flat stomach?
Or jutting hip bones?
Or see my ribs?
Or have tiny wrists?
So what if I never feel beautiful?
I don't need to.
I don't need any of that.
I don't. I...
But I want it. I want it all.
Is it worth the agony?

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