You'll be fine.(cheater levi x wife / reader)

10

                 I was left home alone I heard from William that Levi has been searching for me and almost beat the crap out of Eren. I feel bad for him, but i know he is strong enough to get through it. I began to feel nothing towards anything. I had no tears to cry i had nothing left to do. I had lost my appetite a few days ago,but i don't care at this point. The nightmares began to get worse to the point were William sleeps in the same room as me. so here i am writing about how i feel in my journal.  Pages full of Levi reading through them. I want to go back but i know better then to. my hand misses his, my eyes miss his stupid face, I convinced myself that this was a nightmare and that Levi will wake me up soon, but soon isn't soon enough. i looked back down at my journal once more and began writing my heart out. 

'you completely destroyed me. . '

'you destroyed me like i never knew you could'

'im not over you and never will be.' 

'the thing about love is that simple things like his lips and his eyes break my heart'

'they're not mine'

'and i dont know who's they'll be'

'his hair is therapy to my cold and brittle heart' 

'i used to find safety in his smile'

'i used to feel warmth in the look on his face'

'i've been left an empty shell to wither and fade away'

'i used to think of all the things that we'd be'

'now i only think of all the things that we never really were' 

'i used to call you mine but now you just dont know'

he looked up and sighed looking at the last picture of you he had on his phone. he hasnt been sleeping well let alone eating. he would always visit your cafe to see if you were there but to be only glared at by mr. noodles and his wife. he almost lost his job. that was the only thing he had left to distract him from you. he laid on your side of you the bed holding your pillow. he talked to that photo everyday. he kept the wedding ring with him just in case he saw you or found you. it was rather cute. it was silver, he knew you didnt like big and flashy. it was a rose crafted with one of your favorite gems in it. on the side it had your and his name on the side. Looking at the phot on his phone he began speaking.

'what am i left to do but stand here in the cold.'

'all i got left are some photos of you and your voice stuck in my head'

'saying how you'd be there always and forever until the very end'

'you were everything to me and you always will be'

'deep in my heart that aches for the sound of your voice'

'but no longer would i have that choice.'

'im sorry for everything that i've done'

'for the person i've become that you learned to love but then turned your back like a setting sun'