A Good Kind of Change

Memories

The sooner I can get back to the Bay the better. Moms keeps dropping hints about how she misses Trayson and how well he treated me. If only she knew...

Why can't I just date Colin in peace?

My mom leaves me alone and I get hit with another memory from that Thanksgiving.

I'm sitting at the kitchen table with a bored expression and Trayson is rubbing my thigh. I'm not amused nor excited, I'm annoyed to the max. My cell phone vibrates in my lap and I look down to see I have a text from Alyssa.

"I miss you can't wait to see you! Four more days!" Gosh I miss my best friend.

"Shanya! Get off of the phone, it's rude when you have company over." my mom says. I roll my eyes and put my phone under my thigh before Trayson could grab it.

He gets up and stretches and says he's going to get the bags out of the car. I smile at his good news. Finally he can stop breathing the same air as me.

"Use your manners and help him out Shanya!" my mom says.

I reluctantly walk outside behind him  looking up at the sky once I hit the night air. I see an airplane and I wish I was on it heading somewhere far away from here.

Soon lips are on mine. The usual spark was gone and I felt nothing. I want to push him away but I'm scared he might hurt me more than just squeezing the life out of my

I push him away and he smirks at me and coming closer so that I'm trapped between him and his car. Bad move. I could slap him but that would make this thing even worse because I know he'll slap me back ten times harder.

"Oh baby you just don't know what I'd do to fuck you right now." he whispered. "I want you and I get everything that I want sweetheart. It's only a matter of time before you stop being so uptight."
This dude is weird, and not the good kind of weird either. I quickly shuffle around him and rush back into the house. This cannot be real life. Why can't this just be a normal relationship?

I push him away from me and go back inside to my room and close the door.
I grab my phone and call Alyssa. She is the only one who knows what really goes down between Trayson and I.

All too soon my room door busts open and I hang up the phone.

Trayson looks pissed and I don't care. What he gonna do? Whoop my ass in my moms house? I think not.

My mom comes in behind him and says she's going out with her boyfriend. Oh hell. This is just my luck.

I come back to present time before I could get too wrapped up into that night. That was the first night he actually beat me. I never told anyone about that. Not even Alyssa. It was too traumatizing and I felt so weak.

I never thought that things would ever turn out that way, or that would happen to me. After that day I realized why it was so hard for women to just walk away. It was like he always had the upper hand over me and there was nothing I could do. I would always make excuses for him, and better myself for him but it just wasn't good enough.

I trust Colin, I really do, but after being in an abusive relationship, I just find it hard to put all of my trust in him because he could flip any second...

I know I have to tell Colin about this soon but I don't know when.