Burn One

1.7K 111 14
                                    

*WARNING* This chapter will be very emotional & might be a trigger for some!
You were the luckiest girl alive
You had your innocence then
Conquered the world every time you smiled
Now you don't smile so often
I don't see you so much no more
I rarely pray, but I just pray that you're well
I know you cry every night
Blow it all in the sky
And I'ma burn one for you
You were the luckiest girl alive
And I was to call you my friend
You was who I was who you was
And we loved
You ain't got but so many fucks to give
One life to live
So be true to you
They don't know what they say
And they don't know your secrets
And they don't know about when he took your light away
Just light it all into flames
And I'ma burn one for you
Amber's P.O.V.

It's officially been an entire month that Xiamarion has been in a coma

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

It's officially been an entire month that Xiamarion has been in a coma. The doctors still can't tell when or if he ever will wake up. We just have to leave it up to God. Me and his mom check up on each other often, just to see how the other is holding up. I go to the hospital to see him everyday and just talk to him since the doctors said that he could hear everything around him. I've told how sorry I am for everything I ever did to him and how much I really love him. I take Xiamara sometimes, but I don't like for her to see him like that. She asks me everyday if her daddy has woken up yet and it breaks my heart everytime I have to tell her no.

I didn't really want to, but I cut off all ties with August because I know if I tried to be just friends with him, it wouldn't last. I knew I would be right back in the same messy bed I laid down and made before, literally. Surprisingly, he wasn't upset about it. He said he didn't want to be the reason why me and Xiamarion could never get along or love each other. He handled it very maturely, but I could still tell he was a little sad.

I started seeing a psychotherapist because my mom suggested it and there's some things I don't feel comfortable with talking to my family about, things I've never even told them before. I even started back going to church with my parents on Sundays too. Besides music , they're the only things that can help me cope with everything going on right now. I mean, I can't really sleep at night and I'm always crying out of nowhere, but I'll get better I guess.

My dad, who usually doesn't say much about my life or the choices I make, sat me down and had a very loooooong talk with me. Basically saying how he's disappointed in me and the way I had been acting lately, and that I needed to get my shit together. It kind of hurt my feelings hearing that come from him, but it's true.

So I've just been staying to myself lately. I don't really go out anymore either. The only people I'm around daily is my family, that's it. Ashley, Jordan, and Tae have been my biggest support system, besides my parents, through all of this. If I'm not in the studio, church, therapy, or anything to do with business, I'm at home with my daughter.

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐒: 𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐁𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝟏Where stories live. Discover now