Shards of Clear Glass (A Ghost Adventures Story)

A Diamond in the Rough

The day after the investigation, I'm out with Ashley, Meredith, and Nancy, looking for a dress in Vegas.

Kill me now.

I hate dresses. Give me jeans and a t-shirt any day of the week over a dress or skirt. But, weddings normally dictate that the women wear dresses.

Fairen never got to do this.

The thought slams into my mind like a bullet as I open the door to the store. I feel my breath catch, and Nancy looks at me with concern.

I shake my head, and enter the store, trying to calm my breathing. My older sister, Fairen, had been engaged when she died. She had planned to get married the year after her death.

But she never got to. And now, almost fifteen years later, I'm getting married and searching for a dress without her.

My heart gives a sharp pang, but I ignore my hurt, shoving it away, deep within me.

The women standing around the desk perk up as we walk in, their smiles chasing away the dark cloud that had assembled around me at the thought of Fairen.

A blonde steps forward, her smile touching the corners of her light gray eyes.

"Which of you is the lucky girl we'll be helping today?" she asks. I smile, shyness creeping up within me as I step forward.

She smiles, but I see her eyes go to my scars as she shakes my hand. I meet her gaze as she looks up at me. Finally, I'm taller then someone in my life.

"I'm Camille. I'll help you pick out a dress. Do you have any preferences?" she asks as she leads me away towards the back of the store.

"Uh, no. Honestly, I hate dresses. They show too much skin," I say, and Camille glances at me from the corner of her eye.

"Is it because of your arms that you don't like dresses? Or some other reason?" Her tone is trying to be light, but I can hear the edge behind it; she doesn't approve of my obvious show of my struggles.

I turn to her once we're alone in a room with dresses strung up along one wall.

"Look, you can hate my scars all you want; I don't care. But don't judge me based on my past. Because you don't know it, and you probably never will. Okay? I show my scars to prove that people can change, and that they can survive.

"Most people are silent when they think of dying. I bear my scars, my past, to the world so that way the ones who are silent can know that it isn't worth it.

"So, with that information, will you stop looking at my arms and focus on the task at handsl?"

I know that I was harsh, but my words seem to have some effect on Camille. She nods, shakes herself once, then starts talking about the different dresses.

I remember my decision, the one I had made after the investigation. I ask to see dresses that won't cover my arms.

Camille looks at me strangely, but wisely says nothing. She wordlessly shows me the dresses, and allows me to look through them without commenting.

I choose a few, and go into the dressing room to get dressed. When I exit, Camille leads me to the room where Nancy, Meredith, and Ashley are waiting.

I see Nancy's eyes grow wide as she sees all of the scars on my arms, as well as some on my shoulders. She didn't realize how far my pain extended.

Good thing the dress covered my legs, or else she'd have fainted.

I turn, looking at myself in the mirror on the wall. The dress hugs my body, following and accenting my curves. Lace travels all around the dress, which feels strangr against my skin as I brush my hand across it.

I look over at the four women, silently asking their opinions. They all stare back at me in amazement.

"You look gorgeous, Sare. Zak will fall over on the alter if he sees you in this," Meredith says, grinning.

Ashley pipes up, saying,"Then we'd better film it, because if he does, we need evidence to hang over his head."

The women laugh, excet for Nancy. She's looking at me, and I see her eyes go to the bottom of my dress. I look down, and see my scarred leg through a slit I hadn't noticed before.

Heat rushes to my cheeks, and I step back, allowing the dress to cover my leg more effieciently.

Nancy stands, and walks towards me slowly. The others quiet down, warily watching this silent exchange.

My muscles are tense as Nancy stops before me, my eyes never leaving hers.

Suddenly, I'm wrapped up in her arms. Tears pour out of my eyes in an uncontrollable torrent. Memories flash across my closed eyes and across my skin.

Blades, glass, smoke, laughter, angry glares, rough hands. Sensations rush through me at the speed of light, taking me deeper into my mind, into the memories I've tried so hard to keep at bay for years.

After what feels like an eternity-even though it was probably only a few minutes-my tears stop. I stay in Nancy's arms, soaking up her warmth and love and light.

Nancy pulls back, and looks me in the eye. She takes off my glasses and brushes her thumbs across my eyes and cheeks, wiping away silver tears.

"It's okay, it's okay. Everyone needs to cry sometimes. You probably more than most. Zak's told me some of your past, but I'm sure the rest is just as, if not more, horrible and daunting.

"You have suffered so much. But it makes you stronger. Your strength shows whenever you wear short sleeves, baring your scars to the world. Your strength shows whenever you go out on TV and get scared on purpose."

At this I laugh, unable to stop myself. Nancy smiles, a motherly smile I haven't seen in years. It breaks my heart, but her encouraging words rush through me, trickling into the cracks and holes my mother and father left behind when they died.

"You are beautiful, Saira. Never let anyone tell you otherwise. Our pasts do not define us. Zak is so lucky to have you. And you him.

"If he had to choose anyone in the world that he has met, he would choose you every time. Even with your past and your struggles. Even if you didn't carry his child. He would choose you without a single doubt in his mind."

I laugh, and say,"Please don't say anything more, Nancy. Or you're gonna make me cry even more and that won't be good for anyone."

Nancy laughs, as do the other three girls. It turn to look at them, having momentarily forgotten that they were here. All I see are blurry figures, and I turn back to Nancy.

"May I have my glasses back please?" I ask, a smile on my face. Nancy smiles amd laughs, handing me my glasses. I put them on, and blink to clear my vision.

I try on other dresses, but none of them feel as right as the first one. Eventually, we leave the store, the first dress in a bag on my arm.

Before we part ways, Nancy turns to me and says,"You are a true diamond in the rough, Saira."

The compliment makes me smile and my heart glow. This will be a good wedding. One I will remember every detail of for the rest of my life, I think to myself as I climb into the car with Meredith.