It Will Be Okay (SONADOW)

chapter 18

POV: Sonic
When I had my clothes back on. Tails and Knuckles didn't let me out of their sight. But with my speed, I could easily get away from them.

Now I just have to find Shadow.

To my luck, he was still on his own. I walked over to Shadow and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned and looked at me.

"What do you want Faker?" Shadow asked annoyed.

"Well... I need to tell you something.." I answered.

"I don't wanna hear it. It probably isn't important anyway." He said and crossed his arms.

"No. This is very important." I said. He raised a brow.

"Okay then, but make it quick." Shadow said. I took a deep breath before speaking.

"I have feelings for you for a while now. I wanted you to know how I feel towards you. I really love you and I want to be with you." I said. He looked at me confused. He probably didn't hear what I said because I was talking a bit too fast. "I-I... I love you and I want to be with you.." I said but slower than I did before. Shadow chuckled which turned into laughter.

"You? Loving me? Ha! I don't fall for that. You probably thought we would start dating. I know you're just doing this to become popular again. That's not going to happen Faker. I don't love a piece of shit like you. Why would I? You're just doing it for the attention. Just like you cut for attention." Shadow said. That broke my heart.

He thinks I'm not being serious... He sees it as a lie...

POV: Shadow
He can't be serious. Well, he did enjoy what I did to him yesterday- he still tried to stop me.

"I have to tell you something too Faker. Something I should have told you earlier." I said.

"Uhm.. Wh-What is it?" Sonic asked. I could hear his voice break.

"I want you to know that I really hate you. You're just so fucking annoying. The way you smile makes me wanna vomit. Hearing you laugh makes me wanna cover my ears. I wanna shoot myself when I'm talking to you. I hate everything about you. Just like everyone else around you hates you. You're just a waste of space in my life. Just like you're a waste of my time. I don't understand why you're still alive. I thought you would have commit suicide after yesterday but no. Here you are. Telling me that you love me. Pff I would never love someone like you. No one would love a gay fag like you. You heard me, no one. I don't have feelings for you. Only hatred. I just wish you would kill yourself already. You're not needed in this world any longer. You're no hero anymore. You're no one. Just kill yourself already. There is nothing better for you to do here. No one wants you in their lives. And if you don't kill yourself, I will surely kill you. Now leave me alone and go kill yourself." I said. Sonic was silently crying the whole time I was speaking and when I finished, he burst into tears and dashed away. I rolled my eyes and walked away.

My heart..it feels like it broke... I regret saying that to him...

I shook my head to make the thoughts go away.

I don't like Faker. I hate him. I hope I will never see him again. I want him out of my life. But at the same time, I want him to be with me. I want to touch him. I want to kiss him. I want to hear him moan for me again.

I mentally facepalmed.

I don't know what I want. I'm going crazy.

POV: Sonic
When he was done, I burst into tears and dashed away. All the positivity I had this morning was gone.

Why did I even think Shadow would love me back? He made himself clear enough. He hates me. Everyone hates me. I'm just a waste of everyone's space and time. Shadow is right. Why couldn't I just die yesterday? Why? Shadow wants me dead. There is nothing to live for anymore. I'm going to end this. I'm gonna kill myself. Just like Shadow wants. But not right now. Now I deserve to feel the pain of my broken heart.

I started thinking about the best way to kill myself. After a while, I came with the perfect idea.

Shadow's words felt like a knife was being stabbed in my heart. Why not make it reality? Good thing I didn't take my knives out my backpack yesterday. I will kill myself Shadow. Just like you want. I will make you happy by doing that.

I went to my next class and sat somewhere in the back as usual. The teacher was already in the classroom but didn't care that I walked in a bit early. I opened my backpack to grab my books and saw the three knives I had hidden. I stared at them for a while before grabbing the stuff I needed.

Maybe I can write a letter to Tails and Knuckles. They're the only ones who seem to care about me. But what should I write? I have two periods to come up with something. That has to be enough time.

It suddenly came into my mind. I grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil and started writing. The bell rang after some time and students came into the classroom. I just ignored everyone. Just like they ignored me.

Right now I just want to write this letter. That's the only thing I will do before I die. When the next break comes, I will end my life. I will end my suffering. I will end this act. It will be the end of everything. It will be the end of my existence. It will be the end of my story.