Not Another Diva

11 - Needs, Not Wants

We've been back home from the sushi disaster for a while now, thirty minutes or more, I can't be sure. I have no idea when I started pacing, but at some point I obviously did because here I am wearing a trail in the carpet. Without speaking, Brianna and I entered the house and went directly to our separate rooms. I couldn't tell if she was pissed at me for getting photographed jawing with that Logan guy, or if she was scared. Maybe both.

I have no idea what to think about the whole thing. I'm nervous about how it all looks, one hundred percent. But even worse, even more unnerving, is the intense jealousy that took over as soon as he had addressed Brianna by name. Who is he? I didn't recognize him from any videos or from the hundreds of photos I've seen of her recently.  Although I wasn't paying real close attention to whichever guy she was with, to be honest. I shouldn't be jealous like this, though. I have no right to be.

While still pacing madly, I pull out my phone and open up a browser. I have TMZ bookmarked to keep tabs on any rumors including Brianna's name. As soon as I pull up the site, I see the headline, and the photo gallery. Looks like they got every angle of my shove and the way they posted them, it appears like I had been attacking the idiot. But the real killer was the captions they added to the photos:

Logan vs. Zack: Brianna Royce's past back to haunt her.

And the sideline story that went with it was basically worse. I could only get through the first sentence. Brianna's new boy toy unleashes on Logan Lackey. Great. Now I sound like the douche. This can't be good.

A knock on my door pulls me away from the rest of the story, thank goodness. Reading the whole thing would probably make me sick. There could only be one person on the other side of the door, and I have no idea what she's about to say to me. With my nerves on high alert, I turn the knob and pull the door open, seeing Brianna standing there in my favorite red sweat pants with her hair in that messy bun I love.

Oh damn, I need to pull those thoughts back in and stop looking at her like this. It shouldn't be this difficult to keep the friend zone boundaries up. But dang it, it is.

Brianna is looking up at me, and that's when I notice the bowl of popcorn she's holding.

"Hungry?" she asks tentatively.

I know what she's asking me. I sigh and reply, "Yeah." It's time for some truths to be told. "Give me a minute to change and I'll meet you up on the deck."

Brianna just nods and turns away. I rush to my drawers and pull out some workout clothes. If she's in her comfort outfit, I need to be as well, and working out is when I'm most comfortable. I've been in her home gym so dang much it's practically my own room now.

A few minutes later I find her sitting on the couch on the rooftop deck, the bowl of popcorn next to her. I take a seat on the other side, keeping the bowl between us. It's closer then I've sat to her before, well, except for the picnic scene of the video when we lay arm in arm on the blanket.

I feel my face heat as I remember that day, so I push the thoughts out and try to focus on what we're on the roof to do. Tell some truths. We're both silent for a few minutes, taking in the view from her deck which still blows me away every time I see it. Finally, Brianna takes a deep breath and grabs a huge handful of popcorn.

"I don't think I need the little cards to help me tonight. I know what I need to tell you."

I zero in on one word: Need. Not what she wants to tell me, what she needs to tell me. Crap. I'm nervous now.

"Logan is my former manager." Brianna let's out a huge breath, as if that one statement takes all of her energy. "He found me when I was sixteen and decided I needed to be a star and he was just the person to do it. At first he was so encouraging and positive, determined that he would make my name famous. But he controlled everything, my music, my look, everything. Over time he became more demanding, pushy. I wanted to leave him but I had no idea what I was doing, and by that time I had a record deal, responsibilities. Expectations. It took years for me to be able to break away. Char had been my assistant from the start, my best friend that I insisted stay by my side. She watched everything Logan did, read over all of the paperwork, kept all of the contacts. She learned the job by just being there, without Logan even realizing. So when my contract was up for renegotiation, I ended it. Char took over and we started Perfectly Pink together."