Not Your Lover (2PARK✔️)

Step Nineteen: Haunting

do you want to cross the line?
we're running out of time.
a dangerous night to fall in love.

.

the picture is from my concert, and it's not only my favorite one that i took, but it's my absolute favorite picture of sungwoon ever. he is the ray of sunshine in my life, and i cannot believe STILL that i saw his smile in real life, real time, that fucking close to me shiTtt

.

I find it harder to sleep tonight, the heat blasting through the vent above my bed really making it impossible to settle in. Apart from how physically uncomfortable I am, my mind is caught in a constant whirling hurricane. Winds carrying thoughts of my contract split, while waves pin down the thoughts of Jihoon and everything about Jihoon.

I hate to say that there are more waves than the wind, and more than half my mind is twisting itself around him. Though the thoughts I should be focusing on are far from the shoreline as my mind rests far too long on Jihoon and Jinyoung. And whatever they are.

The idea of them makes my throat itch, and my fists clench. I can't comprehend it, and I don't particularly want to. At the same time, I want to call Jihoon right now and have him explain everything to me. Explain how he could have feelings for anyone while I'm practically killing myself alone. Explain how he could think so little of me, or himself.

My phone vibrates beneath my pillow, and I let the subtle distraction pull me back to my dark bedroom. Unlocking the device, I swipe open the new text from Euijin.

Euijin: put some nice cloths on and meet us dnstairs

I chuckle at the odd typos he makes before questioning his motives. My phone's time reads close enough to midnight to lead on my suspicion.

Euijin: were going to a halloween party

I sit up in my bed, listening for any signs of my groupmates in our apartment. I hear someone shuffling about the living room, but apart from that, the apartment is silent, telling me that either they're all asleep, or they're really waiting in the lobby.

I give my leader the benefit of the doubt, and change into something passable as nice. I still haven't had a proper shopping trip for clothing, the few stops I've made barely passable as shopping. I grab my cleanest pair of black jeans and a navy blue crewneck before shuffling out of my room.

I'm surprised to find Kijung milling between the living room and kitchen, cleaning up random things left strewn about. "What're you doing?" I ask him, his squeak of fear lifting a chuckle from my lips.

"Uh, I'm not allowed to go to the party," he says quietly, holding up a pair of jeans draped over an arm of the couch. "I'm too young, apparently. So I'm cleaning since nobody else is gonna."

"Where are we going that you're too young to come with?" He rolls his eyes, both hands lifting up as if to say, "I know, right?". I lift my own hand in a small wave, stepping towards the front door to the apartment. "I'm sure we won't be out too late, but still go to sleep soon."

"Yes, Dad," he mumbles in irritation, tossing the jeans into a hamper in the corner of our living room. 

I don't correct him, or pay his words much mind as I head into the small hall before our front door. Searching for my shoes, my phone vibrates in my pocket once again.

Babe: Honestly, hurry the hell up. We're all waiting on you.

I feel my cheeks flush at Jihoon's contact name, which I've yet to change. I suppose I won't have to now, to make things look as real as possible. I set my phone down near the door as I feel myself pick up the pace, snatching up a pair of black sneakers that may or may not be mine, not even making a grab for my coat before pushing open the front door and heading toward the apartment stairs.