Rogue

Chapter 16

UNEDITED

Levi's P.O.V

I thought I knew pain.
I thought, not seeing J everyday.
Not telling everyone that I found the man of my dreams, my mate. Someone who loves me just as much as I loves them and meant the world to me.
Not being able to introduce him to my family.

I thought that was the most painful thing in the world, the most agonizing burden to have to carry around everyday.  

I was wrong.

Seeing J look at me like that, like if he was broken, completely and entirely devasted because of my actions. Like if I'd shattered a piece of him, that was the most painful thing in the world.

It was an entirely new, foreign form of suffering that exceeded the physical ones I endured in the past.

He was mad, disappointed and sad.....
I'd never seen him sad before and now that I have, I never want to see it again. I try not to think about it but the image of his tear stained cheeks keeps flashing before my eyes as I walked back to the pack. The site burned into my mind, leaving an unforgiving sting in it's path.

"Levi?"
I look up at the sound of my name, panic filling me momentairly as I look around for the source.

Somehow I'd made it to the pack and walked in blindly, not even waiting to sneak past patrols. Now a pair of curious green eyes were staring at me and the owner was getting closer.

"What were you do-" Uncle Beckett stops short when he catches sight of the continous stream of tears that covered my cheeks. The same tears which hadn't stopped since J ran away from me. The thought alone brought fresh, double-edged emotions slicing their way through my chest, aching as every nerve inside of me screamed for him.

"What's wrong?" He asks gently. I open my mouth to reply but nothing comes out, nothing but shaky sobs and more tears.

I can't stop myself from running to him. He welcomes me with open arms, hugging me tightly as I crash into his chest and cry. Shaking furiously as my soul, body and mind begged for my mate, for his joy instead of the pain I'd delivered.

"It's okay." He coos, holding me to him while rubbing my back. "I got you, it's okay Levi."

I don't reply, I just tighten my grip on him.

"Why don't we go to my house, okay? We'll get you some dry clothes and warm you up." He offers, when it was clear I wasn't cooling down anytime soon. "How does that sound?"

I nod against him, only just realising that it'd been raining and I was completely drenched. I let him lead me to his house, not saying a word.

It wasn't so much of a house though, it was a mansion. It was bigger than my parents' and had been there for generations. The Stone Manor they used to call it, but now it was just a cozy spot for a small, happy family.

*if you haven't read Beta Mates, SPOILERS AHEAD*

There was a time, I remember, when Uncle Beckett lived there alone. When he was the pack's neglected member, an empty shell left all alone when Uncle Emitt broke their bond. But that was a long time ago, it'd been long repaired and all was right again.

I stop myself from entering when I realised I still smelt like J. I hadn't taken his scent off, I couldn't, not after the way things ended.

"It's okay, no one else is home." Uncle Beckett said with the same gentle tone. "Emitt took Amelia and Jacob to the zoo."

"Again?" I ask with a sniff.

"There's a baby panda and Goddess forbid they don't see it in all it's fluffy glory." He explains and I can't help the small laugh that escapes me. "Now, let's get you inside and comfortable."