unwanted

chapter forty

unfair

Leaving the protection of Julian's arms, she moved on bare feet towards the unwelcome visitor.

Kellum was back again. Tonight, his stress and pain called to her.

Checking to make sure Jai was still sleeping in his tomb like bed, she moved quietly.

The very first night on board, he'd tried to get her and Julian to sleep in one of those plastic tubes in the wall, but they refused.

Jess stopped short when Kellum turned and came right at her. Fear danced along her spine. Could he see her after all?

He stopped only a step or two away. He was talking to someone, but she couldn't see anyone else with him and she couldn't hear what he said.

He closed his eyes for a moment, his chin tensed. His stance ridged.

Why did he do this every day? For months there was nothing out of him. Weeks upon weeks of no word, and now he had the gall to show up here and act like he was worried?

It pissed her off.

It also made her sad, but she'd like to think that was because she could feel his despair.

"Go home. I waited for you but I'm not waiting anymore." She whispered the words.

He opened his eyes and seemed to be looking right at her. Wow eyes. Asshole or not those eyes could still reduce her to mush. He reached out, but his hand never made it to her.

An invisible obstacle that she nor he could see stood between them. His hand felt around for a moment then he started to beat at it.

Why was he doing this? Why now?

"You hurt me. You made me believe in you. I hate you the most for that. You made me want something that wasn't real."

Exhausted, he stopped pounding and bowed his head.

Before she could catch herself, she laid her hand where his laid.

As soon as she realized what she had done she removed her hand and turned away. Walking away wasn't easy but she forced herself to do it.

Call it a curse, or bond, whatever it was it wasn't going away, and it didn't matter what she wanted or even what he wanted but she did know this, she wouldn't give in to it. She wouldn't be that weak, stupid girl who wanted a guy who didn't want her. A guy who didn't keep his promises. She'd cut out her heart before she let it long for someone who could spend months letting her hurt just to prove a point.

She would not be like her mom and love a man who would leave her. She wouldn't cling to a cold, lonely memory till the day she died.