eighty-four.

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            FOUR DAYS ENDED up passing by at a slower pace than Lindy could handle.

By the time March eighth rolled around on the calendar, she had to pinch herself to be sure that only a few days had taken place rather than a whole year of endless waiting.

But it was finally happening — Kurt was coming home from Rome.

Throughout those four days, which had hung with the suspense of pointed blade over Lindy's head, she had made a worthy attempt to remain as calm and determined as possible.

She'd phoned Lee, making conversation with her sick father and ending up surprised when he had told her he was feeling better. This was, of course, not a diagnosis of recovery. Lindy was familiar with this sort of thing. Lee was only experiencing a burst of energy that all cancer patients typically got towards their final days. This did not sit well with her, as she interpreted it as a sign that Lee would not be around much longer.

She had nearly driven to Aberdeen to visit Trae, thinking that she might share her pregnancy with him. On short notice, she cancelled these plans and decided against her better judgement. Once again, Lindy shuffled the importance of her own life to the side, believing it to be insignificant when there was already so much going on.

Only one sure thing had remained true in the span of those four days that Lindy waited for Kurt to come home — she had fallen irreversibly in love with their baby.

Not even fear of the future could have stopped Lindy from adoring the fetus in her belly. Whatever bond they now shared was impenetrable, and Lindy felt more than thrilled to have been made a mother.

On the day of Kurt's scheduled flight home to Seattle, Beth joined Lindy in her apartment for what she claimed to be 'emotional support.'

"You shouldn't have to handle this all by yourself," Beth insisted fervently, straightening Lindy's throw pillows on the couch with the dutifulness of a housekeeper.

Ever the wonderful friend, Beth had forced Lindy into plopping down on the couch after fluffing the pillows. With her hands on Lindy's shoulders, Beth turned her in the opposite direction so that she could braid her hair.

While the gesture evoked memories of childhood, they were all good memories and none made Lindy grimace with the thought of earlier adolescence. Beth's fingers, so light and gentle as they combed through her hair, made Lindy think of her mother.

Hannah had done this same thing for Lindy countless times, following an invariable routine. It went in a series of steps; brushing out her hair, laying it flat against Lindy's back, and then lacing each strand into a trickling flow between her shoulder blades.

"I'm not really by myself," Lindy explained, staring forward as Beth slowly threaded her hair behind her.

"Well, today you were. And I didn't want you to be alone when he came home."

"You're a really great friend, Beth."

Lindy felt Beth give her a tap on the shoulder, a sign that she had finished braiding. She turned around and faced her friend, managing a tiny smile and reaching over her shoulder to feel the plait snaking down her back.

"I'm a great friend because I have someone to be great for," Beth said. She touched Lindy's face and when she did, Lindy was reminded so strongly of Hannah that she felt an ache throb in her heart.

"When is he due back?" Beth asked.

"Later in the evening. I want to see him, but . . ." Lindy's voice faltered. After the upheaval of Kurt's incident, she feared that their secret meet ups would come to a sudden halt.

IN THE SUN ↝ kurt cobainWhere stories live. Discover now