REALITY

You Kept Your Word

12/28/17

Tonight I got in bed to sleep,
But my scars weighed more on my chest tonight than others.

I can't feel anything,
I'm scared.

Fear is all I know.

I'm scared that I will hurt you,
Because I won't be able to love you like you love me.

And I know it sounds cheesy,
But it's 100% true.

I don't have anyone there for me,
Except you.

You told me you would always be there for me,
And you kept your word.

You snuck out of your house as did I,
And we met up in the cold snowy night.

We drove to a dark empty parking lot at around 12:30 pm where I told you my deepest feelings,
Or should I say,
The feelings I know of.

You told me you loved me,
You told me that you would always be there for me no matter what.
That I was beautiful.
You see the best in me.
You told me I was strong.

You said that life isn't fair,
That some people get a better start at life than others,
And that is why life isn't fair.

But you are positive and bright,
Like a light in my darkness.

I feel like you care.

You try to express how much I mean to you,
By saying the nicest things people have ever said to me.

You said that you couldn't believe that I was real and that your life would be so much worse without me in it.

You said that I make you feel like no one else has before,
And that when you first met me,
You knew I was different.

But for some reason I can't wrap my head around these things.

It's hard for me to comprehend how someone could love me that much.

And that's why I can't fall for you as you've fallen for me.

Because I can't comprehend how you could love me,
How anyone could love me.

And because of this,
I get scared.

Scared that I will let myself fall and then die from a broken heart once I hit the cold hard ground.

What is reality.

How does one know what's real and what's not real?

You can't.

And that my friends,
Is where my struggles are born.