Hunger

t h i r t y - s e v e n

I walk down the street, a smile on my face. If I knew that being honest would make me feel this better, I would have done it a long time ago.

I get home after walking for maybe an hour. And Nate was still inside my room, I sigh rolling my eyes. He was asleep, peacefully in my bed.

"You're so stubborn." I whisper taking a sit on my desk. "Just like me." I realize with a small smile.

I turn on the lamp on top of my desk and began writing once again. If I must make amends with my past, that means I have to talk with a lot people from it. Like Jer and Eva. And Chris.

I wake to the sound of my alarm going off. I don't know when I fell asleep, or how I got to my bed, but it was time to go to school already. Opening my eyes was extremely hard, since I fell asleep really late at night.

"Wake up already." Nate says, and I sit up straight.

"You're still here." I yawn half at sleep. "You scared me." I murmur slightly hitting his chest.

"You're welcome." He says pushing me. "I was the one that put you in bed when you fell asleep." He adds rolling his eyes.

"Thanks." I say turning to look at him. "But you need to leave."

"You know," he says ignoring what I said. "This is the first time I've slept on your bed." He whispers with a smile. "It's comfortable, I like it."

"I know, but yours is better." I reply standing up and going to the side of the bed his on. "Get up." I say grabbing his arms and trying to pull him up.

"Not even a morning kiss." He whispers pulling me closer.

"I'm serious." I whisper trying to get him out of my bed. "If someone finds you here."

"What would happen?" He asks loudly.

"Nate." I whined covering his mouth with my hand. "You need to leave."

He puckers up his lips and I roll my eyes. "Fine!" I reply defeated. "One kiss and you leave."

He nods and smiles, pulling so strongly that I fell on top of him. He smiles and quickly kiss him. "Happy?"

"No." He says moving closer to my face to kiss me again.

His lips met mine and soon after I heard my bedroom door opening, making my heart skip a bit. Didn't matter who it was I was in trouble, if it was my sister I would die of embarrassment, and I would have to explain what was happening, if it was Christopher he would be extremely angry. And mom, honestly, I wouldn't know what she would say, probably mad I didn't tell her I have a boyfriend.

I quickly stand up and look to the door, to see a pretty angry Christopher standing by it, both his arms crossed.

"Morning." He says through gritted teeth and I sigh.

I honestly would have preferred mom.

"I didn't know you had company." He replies trying to hide his anger.

"Sorry man." Nate says standing up and putting his shirt on. "See you after school?" He asks giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"I have a session today with doctor Baize." I say trying to avoid Chris's glare.

"Well I guess I will see you at night." He adds and leaves my room.

I look at Christopher and he's still looking at me like I did something wrong. "What?" I say annoyed. "Who are you to judge me? You have girls here all the time."

"But not on school days!" He says closing my door. "And not with our parents on the house."

"Whatever." I reply going to the bathroom. "Why are you here anyways?"

"I just wanted to see if you were okay." He says annoyed. "You left yesterday, and I never came to check if you came back."

"Okay." I say closing the bathroom and leaving him behind.

We get to school on time, just like every day and it went fast. I was glad, for the first time I was excited to see doctor Baize and I couldn't wait for our session. But before leaving the school I had to do something.

I left the classroom fast and went to Jer's and Eva's locker to leave a letter for both. I had to swallow my dignity and talk to them. I was right, they were the ones that acted like assholes, but I'm trying to be the bigger person and say sorry for what I did the last time I saw them at my house. Doesn't mean I forgive them, but I'm being mature and that means doing things I don't want to or agree on.

I go to Christopher's car and wait for him to get here. Ever since I started going to therapy mom has been picking up Liv because Christopher must take me to the sessions. My sister doesn't about them, but she knows somethings up, I hate to admit that she's growing up, and sooner or later she will find out.

I see Christopher and sigh relieved. "Finally." I murmur getting inside the car.

He was still angry at me for this morning, but we both know he was actually jealous, so he didn't say a word through the whole drive.

I get inside the building, with a smile. Is the first time I've ever been happy to be here. So, when doctor Baize saw me he frowned.

"There's something different about you today." He says staring at me. "You seem happy." He says confuse.

"I found it." I say opening my bag and taking some papers out. "I finally found what I'm scared of."