Opened Heart

Chapter 4- She's Gone

"Lily what now?!?", I am now completely outraged. By this time my Mom was also crying, but not as fierce as I am now. 

"Lily she got outside. The gate was open, I was cooking, and I didn't notice her go outsid. I think she got curious and pushed it open", Mom replied in between sobs. 

I just stood there frozen, I can't move a muscle from my body. It was a mystery to me on how I can still stand still and not faint. It was like I've grown roots, I stood still only because every part of me cannot move from the spot I'm in now. 

I can't believe that the only memory of my father. GONE!!!!!. All I know is a pregnant dog is out there, all alone, in the streets, a dog shelter, another person found her and decided that she is too cute to be just wasted and be put in a dog shelter or even just report It to the cops, or worse she maybe caught and now being sold. I hope the first two, cause if that happened to her at least she has a chance that a kind hearted person found her, right?!? I think that is better than the cold hearted ones. 

My head felt dizzy, my vision blurred, I was in a pool of darkness with a small amount of light entering the place, then every thought just disappeared and everything became black the small amount of light, fading. 

~•~•~~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~ 

A strong amount of light, was greeting me the moment I sat from my position of the bed. Wait?!?!, how in the world did I get here?!? Even though I don't know how in the world I got in my bedroom, I just let it pass. Though I didn't say I don't want an explanation how I got here!!!!! 

I felt fine now. 

Just then, just at that moment all reality came back in, really can it not give me a break. Thoughts of Lily, thoughts of my my father. All of it came back in, like a tsunami wave hitting me right in the face. ( A/N: if that really happened to someone one day, I swear it'll leave a mark. Either physically or emotionally scarring) 

The next thing I knew I was seated my knees being pressed to my chest and my hands covering my now puffy red face, really if I will audition in a play looking like this I can pass as tomato head. 

I felt a hand rest on my leftside shoulder and somebody gently called out my name, after that he put a hand on top of the hands covering my face and gently removing it from my face, instead he rested my head on his chest instead. He started stroking my hair and said......... 

"Shh.....Shh........ I'm sure we'll find her." 

I looked up, at the face of James. It was full of pity, and symphaty, a.k.a. My most hated emotions in the world.I've had enough of it when my father left us out of the blue. I gave a small shake of my head, pointed at his face, the said....... 

"I don't like seeing it" I said, stuttering a little because of me and my crying. 

"What?, you don't wanna see me. Cause I can leave if you want me to." 

Okay, it like those were painted on his face right now, it's kind of annoying.  

He was about to leave, when I grabbed his hand, stopping him. Pulled him back to my bed and re-created our position a while ago, then I said................ 

"No, I don't want you to leave. I don't wanna see pity and swympathy on your face. I already had enough of it when I when our father left us." I said, which was really hard considering I was crying like a baby and not a mature 17 year old. But on the bright side it disappeared, instead change into a genuine smile, not the you-look-funny-kind one but a truthful one and the I'm-here-for-you one. He again put my face in his chest, which is very hard and I assume he was going to the gym. I wonder if he has six packs? What the hell?!?!, why was I thinking like this, my dog is missing and the fact that, that is the only memory of my still-not-here-father.