Late Night Thoughts

n e v e r m i n e

How can one be so hurt over losing something that was never yours in the first place.

Your hands were not mine to hold, but it felt so right as our fingers fit together like puzzle pieces.

Your arms were not a place I should have longed to be. But when you held me all my worries disappeared and I found myself craving your warmth when you were gone.

Your smell was not something I should have enjoyed. But I wanted to bottle it up and spray it on my pillows because even if you weren't there, your smell made it seem like you were and the nightmares went away.

Your clothes were not mine to keep. But I never thought that something that you kept so close would become my favorite things to wear, proudly displaying that I was yours even though I was not.

Your smile was not something I should have felt was reserved for me. But it made me feel things. Your lips stretched across perfect white teeth that made my heart skip beats.

Your eyes were not mine to gaze into. But i found myself captivated by that gaze. Two never ending glimpses into your soul and I thought I meant something because of the way you stared.

Your soul was not mine to connect with. But I told you things that I have never told anyone I expressed feelings I didn't know I had.

Your laugh was not supposed to become music to my ears. But I loved the way it made me feel, how hearing it made me smile because I was the cause of it.

Your voice was not something I should have let affect me. But the way you said my name made my stomach turn as butterflies flew rapid beating against it walls.

I should have not held the idea of you so close to me, I should have known better. I should have not trusted you so easily, let you into my life with the door wide open. Let you infiltrate my mind and make me think of nothing but you. But I never listen to my brain...always my heart. And now I feel nothing but the loss of something that was never mine.