21 | WHAT'S THE POINT OF FALLING IN LOVE IF YOU'RE JUST GOING TO GET HURT?
the gun bounces off the cement, leaving jaren frozen. john's whole face is red; evan picks up the gun that he previously knocked out of the boy's hand.
"jaren, you could have died," john whispers, grabbing onto his shoulders, "i could have lost you, flower boy."
tears crash down like waterfalls, piling up on the cool cement. the wind picks up his hair, causing brown locks to flow through the air. the pastel pink sky around them fades in and out, turning darker as he crashes down to the ground.
"i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm sorry," jaren repeats over and over again, feeling evan drop down next to him.
"it's okay, jaren. i'll always be there to save you and the rest of the boys no matter what," evan whispers, gripping onto the boy's back and holding him close. all evan wants to do at this point is hold him; he wants to hold him until he promises he won't leave again.
"fuck," john takes a shaky breath, grabbing the gun from evan's hand and throwing it into a nearby bush.
"you know, somedays i see you and i pretend it's not over," jaren shakily says to john, looking at the boy with a torn expression, "it hurts so much to know that i wasn't enough for you."
"jaren-" john starts, reaching out to the boy and getting pushed away.
"don't deny it; we both know that it's true," jaren huffs, looking back at evan, "can i crash at your place tonight?"
tears stream from both boy's eyes, leaving john helpless in the distance. he deserves to feel pain after what he did. he deserves to feel useless in every situation of his life at this point.
"no, you'll go home with john because you two are going to make this relationship work. you two have always been perfect for each other and you are not throwing that away over a stupid bet!" evan shouts, beginning to walk away from his friends.
"evan, are you insane?" jaren asks, making his friend stop, "he cheated on me."
"indigo doesn't like him and he doesn't like indigo! matt and sydney dared her to go over there and cause a scene!" evan yells, looking back at john, "is that what you two wanted to hear? that brock knew about the dare and tried to purposely sabotage your relationship?"
silence fills the air, only interrupted by jaren's small sobs. brock wouldn't do that, would he? brock was his best friend but he never liked john for some reason.
"no, he wouldn't," john whispers, walking closer to the boys, "it's my fault, no one else can take the blame."
"i'm not lying," evan says, looking down at the ground, "he immediately regretted it after that lunch period. he told brian and i, that's how i know."
evan walks away, leaving the old lovers next to each other.
🔋
the car ride is terribly quiet. both boys sit in the front seat of john's truck, silently listening to the upbeat music on the radio. jaren's suitcase sits in the back, resting against the comfy chair.
john turns off the music, "are we going to talk about this or what?"
the question is simple enough but jaren can't provide an answer. he knows how persuasive john is; if the boy starts talking, jaren will immediately give into his words.
"nope," jaren says, popping the p and looking out the window. the car comes to a sudden stop, making jaren hit his head against the glass.
"fine, then i guess we aren't moving," john whispers, grabbing onto the back of jaren's seat and giving him a small smile. god, that smile was everything to jaren and john didn't even know it.
"what the fuck, john," jaren huffs, going back to looking out at the window. he can't listen to the boy; he can't look at the boy. those eyes do crazy things to his heart.
jaren's honestly considering walking to john's house. he knows the way; he used to live there too. a small smile forms on his face as he opens the car door and walks out into the pouring rain.
"what are you doing, flower boy?" john shouts from the rolled-down window, smiling at the brown-haired boy who is now soaked.
"walking, you bitch," jaren sticks his middle finger up, hearing john laugh from the car. he begins walking in the direction of his house while john trails behind him in the car.
"that sucks. i guess i have to walk with you then," john yells, getting out of his car and running towards jaren. jaren giggles, realizing how much he missed this shit.
"john, you left the car on!" jaren laughs, pointing back at the keys still stuck in the ignition.
"yea, because i'm taking you home in the car. you're not walking, beautiful," john grabs his hand, trying to pull him back to the car door. jaren pulls away, the rain hitting against the ground even harder. john stares at him with a confused expression.
"nope, i'm still walking," jaren wraps his arms around the boy's neck, smirking at john. john grabs onto his waist, leaning a little closer to his ex-boyfriend with a grin.
"you aren't walking but at least you're putting up a fight," john smiles, pulling at a strand of jaren's hair, "what do i have to do to convince you?"
"i don't know," jaren admits, staring into john's eyes and getting lost in them.
it starts pouring but john and jaren don't care. the rain around them disappears and they find themselves falling in love with one another again. jaren promised himself that this wouldn't happen again; he can't fall in love with this boy. yet he can't help but give into john's smile and touch.
and as the rain hits against their back, john leans forward and presses his lips against the boy.
🔋
song: falling by léon
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SCARED ➼ krii7y
Fanfiction"YOU AND I WERE MADE OF GLASS, WE WERE NEVER GOING TO LAST" both of them held onto each other for as long as they could. they knew this relationship was going to fail in the end but, for now, the only thing they could do was hope that the other woul...
