In love with a sadist ~ Nyau x Reader

Chapter nine ~ Realization

Despite all the good things that happened, all the things that got resolved - one particular thing still bothered me a lot. These weird ass dreams of me giving birth. What did my brain try to tell me all this time? Was I...perhaps...pregnant?

The possibility was there to say the least. To be fair, we never really protected while having our little 'fun'. I only noticed that important detail when it was waaay too late already. This was worrisome and it happened so fast. How was I gonna tell Nyau about it? In case I was really pregnant, would he accept the baby and raise it with me?

We just returned from the mission in the dunes and let me tell you it was WILD. Next to all the secret love making me and Nyau did behind every little bush and tree, even while the three beasts were asleep due to the fact that Nyau had these random 'boner moments', that would prevent him from falling asleep, we also had to deal with bandits and gangsters. Good thing the three beasts were prepared well for that. Almost too well. Seeing them slaughter them was kinda entertaining. I felt like a princess whose servants were protecting her.

Nyau had the nerve to skin womens faces EVEN IN FRONT OF ME FOR FUCKS SAKE. He also insisted of me watching him while doing so, which was unnerving and disgusting to say the least. Explaining me every little detail about how he does it while his victims squirmed underneath him, I could barely watch without to feel super bad for them. But despite my boyfriend's bizarre hobby I got so happy seeing his happy face every time he had one more face to put in his collection. He would be so cute and happy afterward, it really made me appreciate his presence more than ever. This is the Nyau I fell in love with. The happy, sadistic yet sweet Nyau that enjoyed life to its fullest and never let his coworkers sneers in disgust bother him.

At night when everyone was asleep, due to the hot dune weather I could not sleep too well in the blankets. Tossing and turning all night was not an option either. Instead, Nyau stayed up for me and we talked a lot. Some time in our discussion the possibility of marriage came in question. Nyau wasn't too sure if it was a good idea due to his busy work schedule, but I told him that I was determined to give my everything to him, even if in the end we would not get married, I would ALWAYS give my best for him no matter what and love him to the moon and back.

"You know", the blonde horned boy started, "I could someday not return from a mission."

A minute of silence came over us, shocked as I heard what he had just said I swallowed a big lump in my throat. "W-what do you mean Nyau...?"

"I could die at any time. I'm Esdeath's bodyguard after all. That ain't an easy job and it already costed several previous men's lifes. It could always be a possibility for me to lose my life. And you don't deserve to become a widow so young. You are so beautiful and smart sweet sweet (Y/n), please consider finding another man in the future. I won't even be angry at all. I just want your best. And I'm not worthy of your beauty and charm."

Looking sadly over to me, tears came flowing out of my eyes like mad, I couldn't stop them from flowing so much. He hugged me as I couldn't calm myself down and patted my back. Several minutes passed until I finally had the strength to speak up. "I-i don't think that's right...I don't think you should undervalue your life just because of Esdeath...if anything, I would kill myself if something would happen to you...I wouldn't be able to live on without you. Please don't leave me, don't do this to me, you are my everything and I can't imagine life without you anymore at this point. You mean so much to me...I'm nothing without you."

The last part I almost whispered due to how tired I have gotten from crying so much. It also made me angrier than ever. This was all Esdeaths fault!! This vile woman was more of a bitch than I expected...Who does she think she is anyways...A General...pff! More like a spoiled sadistic whore...treating men like shit like that...By behaving this way she isn't any better than anyone...