I woke up with a headache, it felt like I was hungover. I was suppose to work at the club tonight but I was extremely drained. I checked my phone and I had a text from Cash.
Cash: hey how are you : I'm okay u? Cash: I'm good, I miss your face lmao : loser Cash: what are you doing tonight : staying in bed Cash: loser! Ahahaha..did u wanna get dinner tonight? I'll buy : sure
Throughout the day I stayed in bed just being upset. I watched some YouTube videos and hung out with my mom but majority of the time I was wrapped in blankets. As I got out of the shower I had 3 missed calls from a No Caller ID and texts from Oscar.
Oscar: hey I'm sorry about lastnight Oscar: Ceaser told me you were crying are you okay Oscar: please talk to me
When my mom left my headache came back just thinking about what happened and I started getting anxious so I just put my phone away to charge. I got changed and cleaned up my room before Cash had messaged me saying her was leaving his place in 20 minutes. I was scrolling through my phone and I took a photo and decided I was throwing it up on Instagram.
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When it went up Oscar texted me again asking why I was ignoring him. I sighed and was close to crying when Cash knocked on my door. I walked to the door kissed him in the cheek to greet him then invited him inside. He went to wait for me on the couch when I went to go use the bathroom. I was washing my hands when the block went on lockdown. I walked out and was annoyed that we were about to go out when of course something like this would happen. "So I don't think we are going for dinner" he joked. I sighed, "god I'm so not in the mood for this". I plopped down next to him on the couch. "Well it's okay we could just watch a movie" he tried to make me feel better about the situation, "You got any snacks?". "I think I could probably make spaghetti and I have some microwave popcorn" I stood up with him following behind me when he followed me into the kitchen. I opened the cupboard found the pasta and sauce then went over to the fridge to get meat. I started to cook us dinner as he sat there eating an apple from the fridge. "So you know how to cook?" He questioned. "Well if you meet a girl and she can't cook something as simple as spaghetti I think you need to find a new girl" I joked. "Then maybe I've found the one then" he grinned. I just laughed along to what he had said. He helped me make the spaghetti and grated some cheese for me as I served us up two bowls. We sat at the kitchen bench to eat and were just talking. "So When was the last time you had a boyfriend?", I was a little stunned. "Like a real boyfriend?", he nodded. "I've never actually had one", he looked suprised. "Wow really?" he questioned, "I'm honestly finding that hard to believe". "Well sorry but you're gonna have to believe it". "And you said you were busy weekends but you're free tonight, how come?" He asked. I was real nervous to answer. "Well if I tell you you gotta promise not the judge me" I held out my pinky for him to take with his and he did. "I've been a stripper for about a year now but I've made a lot of money from it", he was taken back. "Oh okay well I didn't see that coming" he chuckled. "Oh my god" I covered my face in embarrassment, "are you lowkey judging me". His hand on my back to comfort me, "no it's actually so hot I'm just a little suprised". I just smiled before going back to eating my dinner.
We had finished our dinner and were on the couch under one blanket about an hour into the movie. He kissed me first and I took it slow, but his pace was getting faster. It was getting real hot between us when I heard him play with his belt buckle. I was triggered and pulled away but he just moved down my neck. I started to have a lowkey anxiety attack then his hand slowly went up my skirt and I completely flipped out. All of my strength pushed him off of me having him almost fall off the couch. "What the fuck" he shouted. I started to have a full blown panic attack in front of him. Once he realised what was going he rushed over hugging me trying to calm me down. My heart was pounding and I was so embarrassed that I started to cry. He repeatedly apologised even though he wasn't really sure what went wrong. Eventually after ten minutes of freaking the both of us out I finally had calmed down. "I'm so sorry I just" then he interrupted me. "No do not be sorry you have nothing to be sorry about it's okay", he then suggested that we just go lay down in my bedroom which we did. I had change into shorts and a top to sleep in. I just laid there with my head in his lap telling him my week has been fucked up. I started to shut my eyes and eventually fell asleep.
