I'm Not Okay {FIN & EDITING}

{27} My Head Hurts Because Of Him But Makes Me Calm Too

I didn't say hi to my family when I walk downstairs. I go to the fridge and open it to only find cheese and old fruits that my mom brought for us but never ate it. I sigh and slam the door close. I haven't slept last night because of Rhett. If he would have shut up and let me be, I wouldn't have screamed at him. And what the hell was he doing? Has he gone crazy and did he want to kill us?

But the real question is what was going through his head when he was driving like that? Did I make him so angry that he wanted to kill us? I sit on the kitchen chair and put my head on the table. Why does he want to be my friend? Why did he take me to his house?

Why did I meet his mom? Why is he so nice to me? I sigh and lift my head and lean it on my hand. Eden glances at me before continue eating his cereal. He keeps looking at me and it was starting to irritate me. I sigh and run a hand through my hair.

"What do you want, Eden?" I said.

He sighs and drops his spoon in his cereal. "What's wrong? Don't say nothing because you look like shit," Ede said.

I glare at him for cursing. "Mom, said stops cursing. You’re still a baby."

"Mom isn't here."

I raise an eyebrow and point to my right which my mom was. "Are you blind? Mom is next to me and she can hear."

Eden shakes his head and repeats his question. "What's wrong?"

I sigh and said "I have some things going on in school...it’s about a boy."

"Why didn't you tell me?" My mom said. I glance at her and look down. I already hear the pain in her voice. I knew I should have told her but she'll never approve of it.

"It’s complicated, mom. I mean, something is wrong with him, but I keep thinking about him day and night. I couldn't go to sleep because of him." There was silence and I feel like cutting off my tongue. I didn't mean to tell them THAT much information about Rhett,

"So...you like him?" Eden said uncomfortably. I forgot about him situation and I look at him and give him a comfortable smile. He calms down a little bit and continues eating his cereal. 

"I don't know if I like him but he's not the only one who's nice or talking to me. There's another boy name Crevan and he wanted to play Laser Tag with me."

"That's nice. You should go. Maybe you can make friends and hang out with them," my mom said and takes a sip of her coffee.

"Why would I do that? He's a jock and he annoys the hell out of me. I don't need or want friends."

My mom sighs and puts her coffee down. "You need some. I don't want you do die alone and nobody can find you dead."

I roll my eyes and shake my head. "Forget this conversation. Now you’re making up stuff to make me freak out."

"No, I'm telling you this because you need to live for once before someone or something ruins it." When she said that, I feel like I need 10 aspirins. I don't know why my mom told me to live for once before someone or something ruins it. How does she know? Can she tell the future or something? I groan when I feel a headache coming. Even talking about him gives me a headache.

"Where's dad?" I said while rubbing my temples. My mom shrugs and takes another sip from her coffee. I look at Eden to answer my question but he looks nervous.

"Is there something wrong, Eden?" I said. He shakes his head slowly and he was eating slowly and keeps glancing at me. I glare at him and take the cereal away from him.

"Hey give that back!" Eden screams. I get up from my chair and lift the cereal up in the air. I may be short but Eden is shorter than me. He tries to reach for his cereal but he fails miserable. He sighs and sits back in the kitchen chair.

"Dad went out with Rachael again." I give Eden back his cereal but he doesn’t touch it.

"What do you mean, "Dad went out with Rachael again"?

He flinches at my voice and I knew it was deadly and I would break any moment. "H-h- went with Rachael to have breakfast with her."

How could he? He knows we eat breakfast together and Rachael isn't our my mom. She should have breakfast with someone else, not my dad.

"Zayden, just leave him alone. If he wants to date Rachael, then he cane. We can't stop him," Eden said tiredly.

"No. I don't want her ruining this family. She should have never met our dad and she needs to get out of our lives."

"This isn't your life, Zayden. Dad has his own. Everyone does and you shouldn't mess it up."

"Why shouldn't I?" I didn't let him respond because I jump out of my chair and run upstairs to my room. I slide on the floor and put my knees to my chest. Why would my dad do this to us? She's breaking this family and I'm trying to put it back together but...he keeps bringing her back her or with her.

Why isn't he with my mom? Why is she calm about this whole thing? I put my head on my knees and my thoughts go to Rhett. Why does he make me calm when I'm having a problem? I close my eyes and try to not think about him because he makes me get a headache but also makes me calm.