Forever Lies

~6~

As I sat there, nails digging their way into my skin, I felt the tears sting my eyes. I was trying to pull myself together, seeing as I had been sitting there for like an hour crying. Or, at least get some of my usual resentment back into system. Suddenly, I heard a faint noise from somewhere beyond my vantage point. But I recognized it well enough to know exactly who it was.

"Go away Deceit" I said, as much frustration and annoyance in my voice as I could manage.

"What? I've simply come to check on you, make sure you're alright." He replied in that sickeningly smooth voice.

I poked my head up, seeing him casually leaning against the dresser with both eyes intently on me. The moment I looked at him, he turned his attention down to his gloves.

"I mean, a lot of what he said was true." he shrugged, still not looking in my direction, attention turned instead toward the ceiling. I growled at that, standing up so I could try and forcefully eject him from the room.

"Oh come on." He said, finally looking at me. "You know I'm right. Your thoughts have got to be telling you the same thing." The sad part was, they were. Deceit's comment almost solidified them in my head.

"You really should listen to them more often, Virgil. I mean, they know what they're talking about."

I wanted to get angry, to yell at him, but they wouldn't let me. They wanted me to hear him out, to understand what he had to say.

"I mean, think about it. You're instilled in Thomas as a fight-or-flight reflex, right? And who tells when to fight and when to fly?"

Them.

"Those thoughts aren't there to harass you, or make your life harder. They're there to help you, and give you the truth when you don't want to hear it. That is their purpose."

"Quit lying." I sneered, trying to use that small part of my brain not convinced to push him away.

"Now Virgil, I may be Deceit, but I don't always lie. I can't hear the voices myself, so I can't prove I'm right. But, you know I'm not wrong."

Those words, coupled with his expression, were all it took for my mind to be taken over. I mean, he's right. Roman never really did anything to prove he cared. Helping me that one time could have easily been a mistake, or maybe he was just trying to keep me from bringing anyone else down with me. I had no indication of why he helped, why should I assume it was because I actually matter to him? Especially after all he said, it pretty clear I wasn't a friend.

"They're trying to help you" He said suddenly, regaining my attention. He took a few steps forward as he talked. "You used to let them help you, when you hung out with us. It's almost as if these light sides are holding you back. Like they're harming, not helping you."

The thoughts confirmed everything he said, but something about that still didn't feel right.

"You know, you'd be better off back with us." He continued after a pause. "The sides that truly get you."

His statement amplified that second feeling, coupling it with anger, allowing it to overpower the first, even for just a second.

"No Deceit. I don't belong on that side of the wall, and you know it. You can come in here saying whatever you want, but my room being over here proves it. This is where I belong." I held myself straight up, desperately trying to keep the stutter out of my voice. My hands were still in my pockets, the right fiddling with the inside fabric nonstop. I just hoped I believe that thought enough to make him go away.

He stared at me a long time, waiting for me to break, hoping his glare would shatter my words.

"Fine." He said eventually, still not moving as he looked me in the eye. "Let yourself believe that lie for as long as you want. We'll be waiting for you. Give it a week. You'll realize who you're better off with." and with that, he walked out.

I shuddered, collapsing back into the corner with heavy, uneven breaths. The one good thing to come from his visit was that I was no longer having an anxiety attack. But other than that, I felt awful.

"Crap." I said, trying to wrap my head around all that he had said. An invitation back into the dark sides, that's what his visit had brought. And as much as I wanted to hate it, a part of me found itself intrigued.

Just give it a week. Are you crazy? That is Deceit. You said so yourself, he's a liar! Not always. Like 98% of the time. What if this is part of that 2 percent?

A week, I decided. One week for the others to prove I actually belong here. Then... then we'll see what happens.