Sheyaa
Having stood there after Kentrell lashed at me for a few minutes,I followed him. He speedily walked away and am not so sure he knows where he is going.
"Kentrell stop. Where the fuck are you going?"I quickened my pace.
"Stop following me!"he yelled his voice trembling. I finally caught up to him. I turned him around only to get smacked." Bitch leave me the fuck alone!"
"Are you crying?"
"No nigga the fuck!"his voice faltered as he turned back away from me.
"Kentre-"
"Shut the fuck up!"he yelled his shoulders shaking slightly." Fuck!"he screamed looking up at the black inkiness of the sky." What do you want from me Shèyaa? I have intoxicated sex with you-which I don't even remember-and suddenly am a hoe?"his voice dripped with anger and hurt.
"I-"
"Shut up!"he turned around allowing me see they wet stripes along his cheeks." One time you are cursing me out telling to stay away from you next minute you are drunk and acting all civil then when sober you act all jumpy around me and insinuating shit! I can't keep up witchu slime honestly."he ranted tears rapidly spilling his chest heaving up and down.
"Ken-"
"Shut.the.fuck.up."he growled and I could have sworn he was gonna hit me but he just bit his lip looking at the sky again. He was really trying to keep it together. He really was." I won't deny it. I did like yoh tall lanky ass ever since I seen you drive into my neighborhood. May be I set my standards too high with you but I actually thought I stood a chance. I mean we was doing good until whatever happened that night. But jokes on me right? Now you can't stop clowning me over it."he looked at me sadly and I never felt so crushed in my life. At that moment all I wanted to do was swipe those tears off of his face and replace his frown. I could feel my heart ache every time he let out a broken sob.
"Listen-"
"No. You listen. I'm sorry about that night. Let's just forget about it not that we remember anyway. Just don't bring it up again. Let's act like we never even met okay. I still like you. A lot. And I so wish I didn't cuz non of this could be hurting me like this. Now am asking you to stay the fuck away from me."he pointed a finger at me. Before I could even think I was on my knees in front of him.
"I'm so fucking sorry okay. I know i've been a complete jerk since that day. I just-I don't even have an excuse."I pulled at my dreads feeling frustrated. There seemed to be invisible walls closing in on me. I looked up my tears blinding my vision. The moon did a poor job of illuminating his face." I really am sorry. You're not the problem here. It's me. I have my own issues Kentrell. I'm sorry I let my past blind me but believe me from the moment I saw you I just-I never wanted to hurt you. I knew I would only end up doing it at some point because that's just what I do. I fuck up everything."I paused leaning back on my legs." And I do like you too. A lot. More than I should."I blurted out my heart doing flips and my stomach twisting. I don't know how it came out my mouth or how I came to terms with it but I was dumbfounded at the fact that it was actually true. I looked at the grass beneath me. Silence fell between us.The wind blowing between us,crickets creaking and frogs echoing somewhere in the distance. My mind was racing trying to wrap my head around everything but I stopped. Overthinking this will only make me fuck up more.
