Bad Boys Wear Pink

6. Assburger

After ascending through the astral plane, i began to grow weak. my big daddy dragon dick couldn't handle the stress of this form anymore, and it was almost time for me to rest. I spend a few more hours drifting through the fuckin cosmos and then i saw something in the distance.

it was a big ass gay rainbow bridge.

"holy shit my dick is saved!" i cried, beginning to transform back into a human. the closer i got to the bridge, the more visible these figures in the distance became. i could see a horned ass bitch in some dramatic cape and another little cock beneath him. I shrieked one last time and slammed down on the bridge right in front of the two figures. they were screwing each other.

what the fuck.

"who the fuck are you?" green ass horned ass daddy asked me.

"who the fuck are you?" i questioned.

"i asked you first," Grigger DILF said.

"i asked you second!" i retorted.

"oh damn roasted. if she weren't naked from being a dragon .3 seconds ago, she'd DEFINITELY have on pants that say RAD!!" the bottom bitch said, "by the way my name is Fortillcock."

"okay. wanna tell me what your name is, Horny McGreeny Cock?" i snapped.

"actually you fuckin CUCK that's what we call the hulk. my name is loki and i'm a god."

"YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A LITTLE BITCH!!" some norwegian ass swiss cheese motherfuckin beef stick ass arm man cried. he also descended from the sky, in a manner much less dramatic than my entrance. he was naked, tan and glorious, bringing a whole new meaning to "double cheeked up on a thursday afternoon."

"I AM THOR KING OF ASSBURGER!!!" naked daddy yelled, coming over to shake my hand and hopefully fuck my butt, like Loki was doing to Fortillcock.

"King of what?" i was so lost.

"King of his brothers ass!!! three cheers for brotherfucking!!!" some random cunt screamed from the sidelines. when the fuck did she get here?

"yes, loki is my brother and he can't resist the power of my double cheekery, leaving us to frolick in the meadow every thursday eve. this midgit little nugget is my dear fuckbuddy, Juniper Nightengale MC Hammer." Beefy DILF said.

this Assburger place was more cracked out that anything else i've ever seen. and i'm literally in space.

"lemme get this straight," i began, "this Locock man is totally rawing Fort Knox in the prison pocket, but you also fuck Locock bc he's your brother and you possess some sort of ass magic, which apparently also makes you irresistible to whatever the fuck THAT white person named ass slut thing is too?"

"that is CORRECT," thor king of asscancer said.

just then, a little blonde cock showed up in the center of all of us. she made a face of disgust, said "y'all ugly!!!", did a crack ass little dance move, then disappeared into a million pieces, flying away into space.

"where did she go?" i wondered.

"she is on her way to transform into Peter Dinkleberg in the great realm, where she can be among those who have also been Doug Dimmadicked," Locock explained. he was done fucking Fortillcock finally.

"come my winged lizard," thor said to me, "you've come to us for a reason. it's time for you to see the rest of Assburger and then i'm gonna bang my brother. they don't call it BangBros for nothing!"

"okay i guess???"

Fortillcock and Juniper Nightingale MC Hammer started making eyes at each other and there's definitely some unresolved tension there.

making my way down the gay boy bridge, i knew my cock was about to get rocked harder than it's ever been cocked before.

fucking bitch.

•~•~•~••~•~•~•~

gave em the ol switeraoo!!!!!

chair!!!!!!

xoxoxoxox quirky cock