Not Doing This

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-Fuck

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Fuck.

Holy shit.

What just happened?

What did I just do?

What have I done?

I dropped the gun and ran over to the man who now laid dead on my floor. The blood was soaking out of his chest and I hovered my hands over his chest, looking for something to stop the bleeding.

Jason looked at me, worry plastered all over his face. It was obvious it wasn't worry over whether or not the man was alive, but how I would handle it once I accepted that he was gone.

He stood, wiping the blood from underneath his nose and around his face with the shirt he never managed to put on and then walked over to me, hunching down and cleaning my face up as well. I didn't have any blood on me, but my makeup was a mess from crying and I was sweating profusely.

"Baby, baby look at me. Not him."

I heard his voice, but it was as though I was underwater and he was calling me to come up for air. I didn't want to. My legs didn't want to move. My head couldn't take the throbbing headache I'd get once I resurfaced. Drowning seemed like the best option.

It wasn't until I felt the tear drop on my cheek roll downwards that I blinked and began to breathe again.

Turning me towards him, Jason wrapped his arms around my neck and pulled me into his chest. I cried in agony, finally resurfacing to see what I've done.

I felt him lift one arm up and wrangle for something in his pants. Once the struggle ended, I realized it was his phone. My eyes went wide and I pulled back from him, shaking my head and hoping he wasn't going to call the police. How would that work? Was this even self defense? Hell, I should go to jail for not calling the ambulance right away.

"It's okay baby, it's okay. I'm calling my dad. The club'll handle this."

He outstretched his arm again and I obliged, going back to his chest and this time only sniffling, facing away from the man on my floor, and towards the window that showcased everything I could lose.

"Hey, Prez."

My eyes flickered towards Jason's face, who had a serious furrowed brow and wandering eyes.

"Yeah, I'm still at Elizabeth's. The Italian guy showed up though and she-" he looked down into my eyes and concern flashed across his face. He then returned to his stony expression and held me tighter. "I had to kill him. He was gonna kill her and me so I put a stop to it. But now he's on her floor and I don't know what to do with him."

I heard a couple of 'mhm's and 'got it's after I had tuned out. Jason was taking the blame for me? Why? If he truly believed that no one would find out about this, then why would he do that?

"Okay baby, we need to clean ourselves up. When is your family going to be home?" He lifted himself than myself up, holding me by my shoulders, close to his side.

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