A Greater Good (girlxgirl)

Bright Room

The light flooded into the room through the blindness window illuminating the scene from the night before. Everlyn and Jane lay on the Jane's bed, naked and on Everlyn's behalf, severely hungover. Jane's arm was strewn over Everlyn's body and their clothes were all about the room, a reminder of the urgency of their lust from the night. Everlyn rolled over and opened her eyes, the sun was blinding and she groaned quietly. Jane didn't stirred from the disruption beneath her arm and as Everlyn looked at her, she felt her stomach drop. She remembered what had happened, slightly. Mainly she remembered the sensations, how good it felt even though she was blind drunk, and because she had been blind drunk and was now living in the wreck of her decisions, she could see how stupid - in theory - she had been. 

She rolled away from Jane and sat on the edge of the bed with her back to her old lover who was in a lovely dream-filled sleep and was ignorant of the panic Everlyn could feel rising in her chest. She rolled her neck around thinking that maybe some of the tension she felt could have been coming from tight muscles, not the absolute calamity that was lying in bed behind her.

She reached forward and grabbed her bra off the ground, it was so bright in the room! How could Jane have such a great apartment which was immaculately decorated no doubt by some gay man from France, but not have any blinds in the master bedroom? Everlyn winced as she folded in half to reach the ground, her head and stomach were in equal amounts of pain and she'd be lucky if she could get dressed without passing out or vomiting. She put her bra on and turned to look at Jane sleeping.

In spite of the regret she was forcing herself to feel (it was more guilt), Everlyn couldn't help but smile at Jane. She was angelic when she was asleep, especially in the lighting. Maybe that was why she didn't have blinds, so she could wow all the girls she slept with when they caught sight of her in the morning. The sun fell on her face and made her skin glow, a small smile played on her lips and little did Everlyn know, she was dreaming about what had just happened. Everlyn leaned across to her and tucked a loose strand of hair behind Jane's ear. She had made a mistake, but if all the mistakes she made were as good as sleeping with Jane, perhaps she'd make a few more in the future.

Jane sighed and slowly opened her eyes, Everlyn moved her hand away quickly and turned back away from her. She couldn't face Jane just yet, she didn't have a painless or clear enough head to even conduct a conversation let alone think about what the night consisted of. 

"Morning," Jane said. She was in a good mood, but she wasn't expecting Everlyn to be, she'd be confused and trying not to panic about everything, it's what Everlyn was like.

"Morning," Everlyn replied quickly, she stood and pulled on her panties. 

She stood facing Jane's walk in wardrobe and sighed before turning around to look at her, she winced at the light from the window.

"Jesus Christ! Why don't you have any blinds?" she said angrily.

Jane laughed. "I do, I was just, ah, too busy to put them down last night."

"Oh." Everlyn stared down at Jane blankly and Jane nodded understandingly, her face falling.

"Is this where I hear about how you're straight?"

"No," Everlyn said offended. "I'm not. You know that."

"Right." Jade nodded unbelieving. "So... what am I about to hear?"

Everlyn rolled her eyes. "I don't have the brain capacity for this right now." She flopped onto the bed with her back to Jane once again and sighed. "I feel so sick."

Jane laughed. "I told you you were too drunk."

"I'm not mad about it, Jane," Everlyn said coldly. "So just stop undermining me and acting like I'm about to walk out and never speak to you again."

"But do you regret it?" Jane pushed.

"Jane!" Everlyn snapped. "I'm fucking hungover, just... just shh!"

Everlyn fell back onto the bed and stared up at the ceiling. The extravagant light fitting was making her feel sick, it was too intricate and fancy for a hungover mind to study. She closed her eyes and ran her hands over the soft sheets, she giggled. Jane watched her with curiosity and bit her lip to stop her smiling at how cute Everlyn was. Everlyn giggled again.

"Jesus, even when my eyes are closed I can't get away from how well you're going!" she explained.

"It's a nice comfort to come home to after seeing dead bodies," Jane said casually.

"But you like it," Everlyn said without opening her eyes or stopping her hand from running over the sheets.

Jane smiled down at her, usually people would back pedalled because of her comment. "Yeah," Jane answered truthfully, "it's fun."

Everlyn opened her eyes and sat up, she stared sincerely at Jane. "You can't expect me to make my mind up right now, can you?"

Jane shook her head. "No."

"What if I can't make my mind up?" Everlyn whispered. "What if I can't end either of them? What if I just keep fucking everyone over for my own happiness?"

"I'm sure you'll come to a conclusion, Ev."

"But it's hard, you have no idea." Everlyn stood back up and walked to the window, she looked down at the street below. "I've always known this, I've always known you and me even when I was and wasn't with James. But I'm not a bad person, at least I don't think I am, but maybe I am because I'm cheating on James again, for a second time."

"Bad people don't think about if they're bad." Jane was trying to comfort her, she could tell that Everlyn was still a tad drunk.

"Maybe I'm not bad as such, just a dick." Everlyn turned around to Jane who was watching her sympathetically. "I don't know what to do."

"That's ok." 

But as Everlyn stared at Jane's face full of understanding, she knew that it would only be so long before Jane was demanding some kind of answer, she wasn't the type of girl to be fucked around. Really, deep down in Jane's heart she knew that she would wait for years just to have Everlyn. In the meantime, Everlyn was going to make the most of Jane's sympathy. She headed back to the bed to cuddle up beside Jane for the rest of the morning and to see out her hangover.