The Book Of IDOLiSH7, TRIGGER, Re:Vale, and ZOOL Oneshots

Inumaru Toma & Isumi Haruka & Mido Torao & Natsume Minami (No Relationship AU)

Toma sighed, running a hand through his hair. He did not plan to pick up hitchhikers while he was traveling. Yet here he was.

"Get in the back," He said, resigned. The tannet grinned and made his way into the back of Tom's car. He immediately started complaining about Toma's music selection.

"Shut up," Toma said, driving off, "My car, my music, my rules." He paused. "By the way, what's your name?"

"Torao," He said, rifling through his backpack. Toma saw what looked like expensive skin care products through the review mirror. Seriously, he thought, if you have the money for those things you shouldn't be here with me!

Not five minutes later Toma got flagged down by another hitchhiker. He pulled over and rolled down the window. "I suppose you want a ride too?"

The new bluenet hitchhiker glared at him grumpily. It was cuter than it was fearsome, actually. "Yeah."

Toma sighed, again. "Get in the back with Tora."

" 'Tora'?" Both hitchhikers echoed as the bluenet yanked open the door.

"Oh," The bluenet said, disgust in his voice as he sat down, "It's you."

"You," Torao said distastefully. They scooted as far away from each other as they could, Torao's nickname forgotten.

Toma cleared his throat to catch their attention. "Name?"

"Haruka," The bluenet answered, munching on a bag of cookies that appeared out of literally no where. Torao made a sound of digust. Haruka glared balefully at him and made a point of chewing louder. Tome rolled his eyes as he resumed driving.

Obviously, these two had a bone to pick with each other.

Toma drove for another ten minutes before he was flagged down by yet another hitchhiker. Seriously, he thought as he pulled over, where were they all coming from?

He didn't even bother with pleasantries this time. "In," He said, pointing to the front seat. The creamnet smiles in thanks as he sat down.

"Name," Toma said as they drove away. The newest addition to his car raised an eyebrow at Haruka's and Torao's bickering.

"Minami," He answered smoothly. Torao and Haruka immediately went still and paled. Even Haruka's chewing stopped.

"The Minami?" Haruka whispered. Toma shot him a questioning look in the review mirror. Seriously, what were they talking about?

Minami chuckled softly. "I suppose you could call me that."

Not even a second had passed before Toma's backseat dissolved into complete panic. There was a lot of screaming and shouting as Haruka and Torao shrieked at him to pull over or what Toma suspected were directions to the nearest globally-famous most secure prison on the planet (at least, that's what it sounded like; then again, Toma's backseat sounded like several dying cats sharpening their claws on blackboard while stress-eating cookies (courtesy of Haruka)).

"If you two aren't quiet in the next three seconds, I'm throwing both of you out!" Toma shouted. The backseat panic quieted until the only sounds were heavy air intake and Haruka stress-eating.

"Now," Toma said calmly as he drove, "Tell me the problem with Mina in my car."

Minami merely raised an eyebrow at the nickname before turning back to the window.

Torao stared at him in terror while Haruka blurted out an explanation around his rapidly disappearing cookie. "Minami is a hitchhiking legend," He said in fear, "There's a rumor he hitchhiked with a group of Japan's most wanted criminals with only a scarf and a paperclip and came out unscathed but covered in blood. Later the police discovered the car and everyone inside was dead." Haruka shivered. "There's another rumor that he was approached by a stalker pervert who tried to rape him. Minami stabbed him with a pen and the guy got ran over by a police car. They got charged with involuntary manslaughter." Haruka cleared his throat. "Of course, no one knows if the rumors are true."

Toma looked over at Minami, who looked at him innocently. Seriously, how could such a sweet-looking person be guilty of all that? By Haruka's and Torao's beyond-scared expressions, though, it seemed they belived every one of those rumors to be true.

Not like it bothered him. Having a possible murderer in his car - much less his passenger seat - didn't bother Toma. In fact, he just didn't care. "In or out, I don't care," He said, kerning a thumb over his shoulder. Haruka and Torao whispered fearfully in the backseat, but neither made a move to ask Toma to pull over. He nodded satisfactorily and put a hand in the backseat.

"Hand over a cookie, Haru," He commanded.

"But it's my last one!" Haruka complained.

"I don't care," Toma said, "My car, my rules." Torao raised an eyebrow at the repeated words as Haruka grumbled about his new nickname but grudgingly handed over his last cookie. Toma took it and bit into it. It wasn't a bad cookie.

A few hours later - as well as eight backseat fights, two bathroom/drink/food breaks, twenty-two packs of cookies, and yet more complaining about his music selection later - everything was blissfully quiet. Haruka and Torao had fallen asleep and Minami was reading silently. Toma sighed happily.

Then everything turned black and the shouting started.

○|○|○|○|○

Toma woke up to shouting, eyes still closed.

"I want pancakes!" That was Haruka.

"Hey, has anyone seen my new skin moisturizer?" And that was Torao.

Where was Minami, though?

And there was a consistent pain battering his forehead. Tome opened his eyes to see a certain creamnet, fingers ready again to flick his forehead.

"Good morning, Inumaru-san," Minami said, stealthily moving his hand away.

And there was Minami.

" 'Morning," Mina, Toma mumbled as he sat up, rubbing his forehead. "I just had the strangest dream."

(A/N): Surprise! Not actually an AU. And this turned out to be shorter than I expected. Oh well. Also, due to future oneshots I have already on paper, I have now upgraded my self-imposed word limit to 1000+ words, not 1000-1500. Yay!