Hero [Ironstrange]

22 - Team Meeting

Tony

"Hello, everyone, thank you for coming," Nat announces. "Thank you, Bruce, for agreeing to host."

"Um, Nat, I didn't a-" Bruce starts, but is interrupted quickly by Natasha.

"We're going to be discussing 'Operation Ironstrange', which is the mission to get Tony and Stephen together." Nat pauses. "Any questions?"

"Yeah, why the fuck was invited to this?" Rhodey blurts out.

"Pepper thought it would be essential to bring you for some reason."

"Potts, what the hell, I have better things to do." Rhodey groans.

"Oh, shut up, James, I know you want the tea, so stop pretending you actually have a life." Pepper scoffs.

"I have a question," Bucky raises his hand. "If we're trying to get Stephen and Tony to fuck, then why did Tony come to the meeting?"

"You should've been paying attention yesterday," Nat sighs. "Someone explain this shit to Bucky."

"Gladly," Loki smirks and pushes Nat off the small podium Bruce made out of a few cardboard boxes.

After explaining, Loki bows and steps down from the podium, to be extra.

"Wow, Stephen really is a dense motherfucker," Rhodey sighs.

"Ugh, tell me about it," Donna complains. "Imagine having to live with that idiot for your whole life."

"HA, REMEMBER CHRISTINE?" Bucky snickers. 

"Please don't mention that situation again," Nat groans. 

"Who's Christine?" I try to say, but of course, I'm ignored, like every day of my sad life. 

"I don't know what you're talking about, it was hilarious," Donna chuckles.

"It was only funny to you because you weren't watching Christine and Stephen's painfully sad interactions every single fucking day," Clint argues. 

"WHO'S CHRISTINE?!?" I ask, only to be ignored again. 

"Did you bring the small doggo? Cuz that's the only reason I came." 

"Yeah, I got you, man," I call Harley over from his little corner that Bruce made in the garage. "This is Harley,"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH," Clint squeals. "HE'S SO CUTE!" 

"LET'S GET BACK TO THE POINT!" Nat yells over everyone. "IS EVERYONE READY?!?" 

"I HAVE A QUESTION, NATASHA!" 

"What is it now, Bucky?" 

"Doesn't Tony kinda look like Robert Downey Jr.?" he asks, looking over at me.

"WHAT? No, are you crazy?" Clint squints at me. "Actually, I do, see it," 

"LET'S CONTINUE WITH THE MEETING!" Pepper yells. "IT DOESN'T MATTER IF TONY LOOKS CONSIDERABLY LIKE ROBERT DOWNEY JR." 

"Thank you, Pepper," Nat sighs. "Yesterday, at lunch, Clint, Loki and I made a plan for this operation. Clint, would you like to go over the plan?"

"Huh?" Clint looks up from playing with Harley. "Oh right!" Clint puts Harley down and walks up to the podium, flipping Bruce's chalkboard over, revealing the plan.

"Step One," Clint points to the first picture, five stick figures, labeled, 'Loki', 'Clint', 'Tasha', 'Buckaroo', and, 'MAH BOI STEPHEN'. "We have to get Stephen to realize he obviously has feelings for Tony." 

"Step Two," Clint points to the second picture, of me and Stephen together in stick figure form.

"Wow, Clint, your drawing of me actually makes me look handsome," I snicker.

"DON'T INTERRUPT!" Rhodey scolds. 

"I told you he would enjoy this shit," Pepper whispers to me. 

"Anyway, as I was saying..." Clint glares at me. "STEP TWO," Clint points to the drawing once again. "Once he confesses to us and shows more signs of crushing on Tony, we must start getting ready for the soulmate reveal."

"eXcuSe mE, thE wHaT?" 

"Well, you do have to tell Stephen that you're his soulmate one day," Loki shrugs. 

"I HAVE, THOUGH," I complain, crossing my arms.

"Yeah, but you have to do it in a more direct and romantic way," Donna argues.

"Step Three," Clint gestures to the third drawing which wasn't a drawing at all but instead a printed out stock photo taped onto the chalkboard. The picture was of a sunset and some couple staring into the light. "Romantic moment between the two, probably a kiss....or more?" Clint winks at me.

"Maybe less?" I wink back, though it probably looked weak since I knew my face was bright red. 

"It'll be fine, Tony, we'll be watching from the bushes the whole time," Clint assures me. 

"NO," Loki shouts. "THE KISS MUST HAPPEN."

"Yeah, actually it does," Donna agrees.

"What the hell, Donna, I thought you were on my side." 

"Stephen's probably not going to believe you're his soulmate. And the only way to prove it is..."

"To kiss him," Pepper finishes, smiling. "Yeah! I read that somewhere." 

"Please explain, there are idiots in the room," Clint looks at them confused.

"I'm not an idiot, but I still would like you to explain," Bruce adds.

"So, basically, when soulmates have their first kiss, their soul marks glow, indicating that they are soulmates," Donna explains.

"Just like when they glow the first time your soulmate says your name," Pepper continues.  

"Okay, Step Four," Clint starts

"Why is there a step four?" I ask. "Didn't everything get resolved on step three?"

"STEP FOUR!" Clint talks over me. He points to a stock photo of someone proposing. "Marriage."

"I don't think we have to go this far, Clint, let's jus-"

"STEP FIVE!" Clint points to a drawing of a house, with three stick figures and a poorly drawn dog. "They'll live in a nice house, and have a daughter named Morgan, and Harley will be there too and they'll also have a pet snake named Onion and they'll-" He rambles on until Nat stops him.

"Okay, Clint I think that's enough for now." She announces. "WE WILL ARRANGE ANOTHER MEETING SOON! CHECK THE GROUP CHAT FOR UPDATES!" She steps off the podium.

"MEETING OVER."

- - -

A/N: AAAAAAAA I CAN'T BELIEVE 3 UPDATES IN A ROW! WHO AM I ANYMORE?!?!