The Modern Queen

coming out

Asa picked at the sleeves of her blouse, biting her lip as she gazed in the mirror. Everything felt like too much one moment, and not enough the next. It had never been an issue before, before she had met her friends. She dressed how she felt–often turtlenecks and long skirts or very loose trousers, regardless of how she felt that day.

Then, she met Aishlynn. It didn't take long for her to come out to her–Asa knew that a lot of people didn't understand Aishlynn's mannerisms, but she did, and she felt safe around Aishlynn. Safe enough to be herself, which was really all that she or anyone could ask for out of someone.

Aishlynn's sister and friends were a different story.

It's not that Asa didn't think they would be accepting. She just... well. It was all still so new to her, hanging around them. She'd known Aishlynn for several years now. Talitha as well, actually, though in a more distant way. The others were... new.

But now she and Aishlynn were dating. Which meant she was going to be around them more. And she didn't want to have to hide part of herself, part of their relationship with this group that had become so central to Aishlynn's life. (No matter what she said.)

Knowing all of that, feeling all of that, didn't stop her from being nervous, though.

There came a knock on the door.

"Asa?" It was Aishlynn. Of course it was. "We really need to be leaving soon."

"Just a minute, darling." Unconsciously, her voice went higher, softer than normal. She'd always had a softer and higher pitched voice than AMAB people generally had, but years of practice and work had allowed her to make it even more feminine, when she needed it to be.

"Alright," Aishlynn said. "I'm going to tell Talitha to order your tea."

Asa tried to frown, but wasn't quite able to. "Underhanded," she said. "You know I like my first cup hot."

Aishlynn laughed. It was a wonderful sound, and not one that Asa got to hear often. She was in a good mood. It made her smile widen. "Whatever it takes to get you out the door," she said, but Asa knew that she would wait as long as was necessary. Would cancel the whole outing if Asa said the word.

It was that thought that finally gave her the courage to open the door, and step out into the hall.

Aishlynn looked her over.

Asa hadn't put on anything fancy. Just a nice, butter yellow sweater dress over black leggings and boots. Her hair had been braided, resting over her shoulder. Small hoop earrings completed the ensemble.

She smiled. "How do I look?"

Aishlynn took her hand. "Wonderful."

###

The bell of the cafe tinkled as they entered. Asa could feel her palms sweating. Aishlynn paid them no mind, instead guiding her across the cafe to a corner booth.

A crumpled straw wrapper bounced off Talitha's cheek and rolled off the table to land by Asa's feet. None of the table's occupants paid it any mind–they were too busy watching Talitha brace her hands on the table. "Oi!" She grasped at the straw in Lyr's mouth, which he pulled out, laughing.

"I'm so glad to see such shining examples of maturity," Aishlynn drawled.

Talitha turned to them with a grin. She glanced at Asa, but didn't even bat an eye. "Right, because your reaction would have been any more dignified," she shot back. She didn't wait for Aishlynn to respond, though, instead looking directly at Asa.

Asa could feel her heart beat faster.

"You look lovely, feathers," she said. "Though, there is a distinct lack of... feathers."

Asa snorted. "Believe it or not, I don't wear them every day." She paused. "And... thanks."

Talitha grinned. "So, like, are you trans? Nonbinary? Using gender neutral pronouns, or feminine ones? Or! Or, wait, is this like, you still prefer masculine pronouns but you just like wearing traditionally feminine clothes? Or–"

Alinora yanked Talitha back into the booth, though this had a side effect of causing her to fall in Alinora's lap. "Give Asa a chance to answer," she said, and Asa appreciated the purposeful lack of pronouns.

"I'm genderfluid," she said. "Today I'm feeling more feminine. Feminine pronouns are appreciated, but neutral and masculine pronouns are fine too."

Talitha squinted at her. "Are they, or are you just sayin' that to make it easier on us, because, believe me, I can handle the–"

Alinora covered her mouth. "Aishlynn wouldn't let her lie to us, Tali," she said, in a voice of long-suffering patience.

Lyr nodded. "It's true." He glanced at Asa, and then at her hands joined with Aishlynn's. "Don't think that's the only thing that they came to tell us, either."

It was Aishlynn who answered this time, lifting and extended their conjoined hands. "We're dating," she said, plain and simple–as she preferred. It made Asa smile.

Talitha raised her glass. "Hear, hear! Congratulations!"

Lyr joined suit, and after a shared glance, so did Ava and Alinora.

Alinora lowered her glass and looked at Aishlynn. "So is that where you've been disappearing to? Date night?"

Aishlynn nodded. She and Asa slid into the empty seats–Asa next to Talitha, because Aishlynn sitting next to her was always a disaster, and Aishlynn next to Ava.

Alinora glanced at Asa. "You'll be coming around the house more too, won't you?"

"If that's okay?"

Alinora shrugged. "Aish's house. I have a system, though. I'll run it through with you."

"It's not complicated," Talitha said. "Don't worry 'bout it."

"If it's not complicated, why do you mess it up every time you come over?"

"Because you're adorable when you yell at me~"

Alinora scowled.

Aishlynn snorted. "I did warn you she was obnoxious," she said, and reached over to take Asa's hand over the table.

Talitha gagged playfully, which caused Alinora to dump her into the floor. Lyr laughed, Ava rolled her eyes fondly, Aishlynn hid her smile into her shoulder, and Asa?

Asa relaxed into her chair, taking the drink Ava slid her, and smiled into her cup.