finally found you ~Carlisle Cullen ~

vingt-six

Carlisle p.o.v 

no one noticed how she disappeared, out of the blue,and entirely unexpected.

one moment she was waving at her newly married sister next to me, and the next she was gone. 

sometimes, i keep thinking that she was a ghost... a fragment of fiction that my brain made. 

so perfect, and lovely... and now she's gone. i have never felt such wrenching pain like i do now.

her scent is stuck in every corner in the cottage, her voice rings in my memory and night time is the worst.

i had to stay in the cottage for days, dry sobbing. not even the transformation pain is compared to this pain. i couldn't focus on anything and i know i worried my family.

even charlie has this sympathetic look in his eyes whenever i visit him to ask if she contacted him. the only answer he has for me is " she sent me a message at the end of the wedding saying she went back to England and it was an emergency, and then she called me when she was there saying that i shouldn't worry and it was just some paperwork  she left there"

but she didn't bother to even tell me! or tell anyone else but charlie, and that angered me, saddened me.

'was it all fake?'

' have i did something wrong to the point to ignore me and my family altogether?' 

' was she just tolerating us till the end of the wedding?' 

my head twirls with unanswered questions, i tried to call her billions of times, and her voice mail is full with my desperate words.

my alter can't stop weeping inside my head, we feel like it's our fault.. our mate is away from us because we weren't enough. and i never wished for death more than i do now.

Alice couldn't  see her in her visions at all.it's like she vanished from the surface of the earth.

" the only solution left is to go to London and look for her... Elijah will pull some strings and we will find the university she studied in and with that her address " my sister stated firmly while i sulk holding my head between my hands . my family never saw me this disheveled, my hair is a mess and my clothes are on my back for days. i couldn't find the energy to do normal things i did for four centuries nor did i find it in me to go hunt, which explains the dark purplish bruises around my eyes and the coal black irises. i can see worry and sympathy in all of their eyes but i couldn't find the strength to undo that .

" what if she doesn't want to see me again? I-I can't handle living after that" i reply weakly from how my throat feels like i ate tons of sands .

" then at least you'll get to know for sure what is happening! i can't believe she did this to you! " rosalie said enraged . if i had the strength, i would've growled at her for speaking about my mate like that. 

" you can't stay around humans for that long, even if you had the most self control ever... you won't be able to stay collected in that long flight" jasper noted 

" jasper is right, you should hunt, take a shower and ill book you a flight to London as fast as possible" my sister's soothing and caring voice helped me to nod at whatever she told me and Emmett volunteered to go hunt with me so i won't be lost in my sadness and not actually feed. 

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 so this is the new moon depression for Carlisle, tell me what you guys think.

comment and vote