21. you say no

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The next day, Derek and I are, once again, all over the internet. My notifications are overwhelming. I log out of all my social accounts to have some peace. It's crazy.

This time, there are pictures of us and his family.

DEREK'S MATCH MEETS DEREK'S FAMILY, one of the headlines reads. My life is starting to get consumed by Derek Collins and I'm not sure I like it. I guess I shouldn't be surprised. He is a celebrity, after all. People want to know all about his life and right now, that includes me.

On Thursday, I am actually followed on my way to work from school by people from the press. I cover my face with my book and look down at my feet as I walk. There are only about five of them but they're all asking questions at the same time and it's too overwhelming.

"You've met Derek's family just weeks after you guys met, would you say things are moving too fast?"

"What did you think of Derek's family?"

"Derek and Sadie were seen together earlier this week, are you at all concerned about their history?"

Oh my God.

How does Derek deal with this every day and still be in a good mood? I can feel my frustration and anger getting bigger with each step I take. I'm speed walking but they're quick to keep up with me. My silence doesn't discourage them at all. They just keep talking and trying to take pictures and videos as they follow me.

I'm just an ordinary girl from Newport.

What do they want from me?

I almost sigh in relief when I finally reach the restaurant. I make my way into the backdoor, leaving all the noise behind me. I take a deep breath once I'm inside then continue to make my way into the kitchen. These people have made me late. I can't afford to lose my job right now. I'm late on rent. I need this paycheck.

"Are you alright?" my manager asks when he sees me.

I nod as I put my hair up in a ponytail. "Yes, sorry I'm late."

"Don't let it happen again."

I shake my head then turn to the sink and wash my hands. I'm still trying to catch my breath. I really hope this doesn't become an every day thing. I don't think I could deal with it.

I force myself to focus on my job and work through the evening. I'm so glad I don't have class tomorrow. I'm looking forward to sleeping in. The interview that I'm doing with Derek and Ian isn't until the afternoon.

It's so crazy that in the midst of all this attention, my life still keeps going. Work and school still keep going like nothing is happening. My ordinary world is colliding with Derek's and the result is messy. It's causing an imbalance in my life and it's making me think about what's going to happen when all of this is over? I can't be naive enough to believe that things are always going to be great between Derek and I. I would be stupid to think that this thing between us is going to last forever. I know it can but I also know it can't and the negative always trumps the positive.

All this thinking drains me and I'm both physically and emotionally exhausted by the time service is over.

I get a text from Derek as we're cleaning. He's waiting outside for me. It makes me feel a little better. Seeing him will always make my day better and there's nothing I can do about that.

He's leaning against his car when I walk out. He has his phone pressed to his ear and he's looking down. He's wearing a black cap so it covers most of his face as he looks down at the ground. He's not saying much. He just nods and says "yes" and "alright" a couple of times. He hasn't seen me, so I stand a few feet away, next to a wall trying to give him some privacy.

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