Don't You Worry About The Distance

Chapter 35

Kellin's POV

It was that time of the year when the firm was being audited, therefore Vic's and I bosses were asking us to be as helpful as we could be, often delivering important papers the auditors asked for while they worked in the meeting room all day long. It was super tiring but we wouldn't complain, after all, it was still our job.

It was Friday, the last day of the audit and I couldn't wait for the day to be over. Thankfully, it was half an hour before we could leave but I couldn’t rest just yet. Sighing, I leant against my chair to catch my breath after running back from the archive room where I had rummaged through the shelves, trying to find papers from a really important case we had last year but I had no such luck. I racked my brain to try to think about who had the case, it was then that it hit me. It was one of Vic's cases.

With that thought in mind, I sauntered over to his desk, finding him going through what looked like important files. When he sensed I was close, he looked up, smiling sweetly at me before going back to what he was doing, a frown on his face while he looked for whatever he needed. This had been a normal thing for the past week.

"What brings you here?" He asked while going fairly fast through files. His eyes never left the folders, stopping every once in a while to read their lids, but going back to the research fairly quick when he realized they weren’t what he was looking for.

"I'm in search for that case you had last year. They want those files and I figured you'd have them." I said, never looking away from him. I smiled when I noticed he was wearing a tie I gave him a couple Christmas ago.

He looked up at me with a confused expression. "Which case, Kels?" He asked with his head cocked to the side, his big brown eyes looking at me curiously.

"The one you were working on before you left." He looked at me as if he were telling me to continue, I sighed and kept talking. "That one where this man murdered his wife for cheating." I finally said, shifting uncomfortably on my feet.

A wave of realization washed over his face and sensing my awkwardness, he went back to the folders. "Uh, yeah. I think the files my boss sent are still in my email. Mind checking the computer?" He finally looked up at me. "I'm kinda busy here." He shot me an apologetic smile while he removed his right hand from the folders and caressed the back of mine with his thumb affectionately. I looked down smiling while I felt my cheeks burning. It was dumb how mushy I still got around him but I guess that’s what love does to you.

"Yeah, sure." I shrugged, smiling. I went to take his laptop out of the briefcase, turning it on and waiting until it loaded so he could put the password in. Meanwhile, I looked at him, noticing how his long brown hair got in his way and I chuckled at how he struggled to hold it back. The smile remained on my face after a couple seconds of admiring him because he looked really into what he was doing but I had to interrupt so he could put his password in. Once he was done, I spoke. "I'm gonna work on my desk since you're kinda busy here." I said nervously with the computer resting on my hands, his eyes watching me intently.

"Kay, have fun." He said sarcastically with a smirk, which made me smile, then I turned around and went back to my workplace. Setting the laptop right in front of me, I waited for it to load completely before going in the mail application. I rested my elbow on the desk while my chin was placed on my hand. I was bored as hell but that changed quickly when the updated mails appeared to the right corner of the laptop’s screen and a frown quickly fell over my face.

From Alex G:
Vic, please. You're the best I've ever had and I don't want to lose you. Please come back. I miss you.

I couldn't help but to sit straight, looking at Vic, who was just across the room completely oblivious of what was happening. Biting my lip and tapping my fingers against the aluminum’s surface hesitantly, I pondered whether or not I should peek in my boyfriend’s privacy. After all, it was all past right? It’s not like he had been messaging Alex back, but I wasn’t sure of that so with curiosity taking the best of me, I finally decided on opening the chain of messages. Scrolling down the screen, I saw the latest incoming mails that were much like this one, all of them going un replied and a small smile was placed on my lips.

Deciding I shouldn’t have read the messages in the first place, I went to close the tab when a reply of Vic peeking from the lower region caught my attention. I scrolled down to read the message properly, my breath faltering immediately.

From Alex G:
Still pretty turned on from earlier. Damn, Fuentes what are you doing to me?

To Alex G:
You act like you don’t like it, Alex. Just consider it a little preview.

From Alex G:
You’re coming over after. Hope you know that. You aren’t leaving bed for an entire week. Make sure you’re energized ;)

I instantly felt sick to my stomach and although I tried not to be upset about it, I couldn’t help it. I forced myself to look at the date, realizing it was during the time we were broken up but it still hurt to know that he lied to me, saying it was a one time thing when it was clear that what they had was regular. It hurt to know that while I was mourning and in a downfall, he had been in bed with Alex. I bit my bottom lip to stop it from quivering because I wasn't willing to shed any more tears but it was useless because a few were already rolling down my cheeks.

"Kels? Are you okay?" I was startled when I heard Vic’s voice. I looked up, finding him towering over me, a confused expression on his face while he stood at the foot of my desk with a look of concern on his eyes. I did nothing else but to clear my cheeks from any signs of tears, glaring at him.

Without saying another word, I turned the laptop around. Curiously, he looked down and as soon as he realized what I had found, his eyes went wide, face draining of all color. He met my eyes panicked, silently begging for forgiveness but I couldn’t even look him in the eye. Sighing, I shook my head and stood up, taking my jacket with me. I was about to walk away but he held my arm to keep me in place.

"Don't you fücking touch me." I hissed, yanking my arm free out of his hold. I was thankful almost no one was around to witness this. I didn't want to cause a scene at work.

"Kels, please let me explain." He begged, his eyes welling up with tears much like mine had been a couple minutes ago. I laughed bitterly and glared at him.

"What the fück are you going to explain to me?" I asked with venom dripping from my tongue. "That you lied to me and fücked that asshole I don't know how many times while I was miserable? Do you actually expect me to believe that when I caught you in bed with him was the very first fücking time you slept together?" I asked in a sarcastic tone, wiping the tears that were now freely falling down my cheeks harshly. "Way to fücking ruin my trust, Fuentes." I spat looking him dead in the eye and went to walk away but he stopped me once again.

"Please, Kels." He begged, his voice cracking and tears streaming down his face. I almost felt myself giving in but I closed my eyes, breaking free from his grasp.

"Leave me alone. I don't want to see you right now." I whispered before going down the stairs, I didn't want to be near him right now and I didn't have the patience to wait for the elevator either.

While I was going downstairs, I didn't hold back anymore, loud sobs escaping my lips while tears rolled down my cheeks. I actually had to stop a minute to catch my breath, it felt like I was suffocating and I couldn't keep going anymore. I couldn't believe I actually trusted everything he said, I should've known better.

Calming down my sobs, I took my phone out of my pocket and leaning against the wall, I dialed the number of the only person I knew I could always rely on no matter what. Matty.

-

Hours had passed since the fight and I found myself wrapped in Matty's arms, both of us cuddling on the couch of his living room. I felt at peace for the most part. Of course Vic didn't leave my thoughts in any moment, I was still upset about what I found out but I also knew I said so many hurtful things I didn't mean. We were supposed to let go of the past and move forward with our lives but I had to look those god damn emails. Sighing, I pulled away, wiping my cheeks and sniffling. I knew I was behaving like such a drama queen but I didn't care, I had the right to be upset.

"I think you shouldn't get this worked up." I heard the ginger whisper next to me, I turned to look at him incredulously but he was looking down at his hands in deep thought instead. I observed the way his eyebrows were furred together in a frown, and I wondered what he was thinking.

"Why would you say that?" I asked confused with a frown of my own. He sighed, finally looking up at me.

"Were you completely honest with him?" That question startled me. To be honest I didn’t expect that but I didn’t understand what he was trying to get at. I knew it was going to be a serious talk though, which is why I sat down properly and turned to face him.

"Of course I was, what do you mean?" I asked, my head tilted to the side, observing his every move. He took a deep breath, averting his gaze to the wall in front of us as if he were trying to gather courage before speaking.

"I mean, were you really honest with him?” He asked looking me in the eye but when he saw my confused expression still, he sighed speaking slowly. “Did you tell him about us?"

If I felt like shït before, now I just wanted to crawl to Vic and apologize. I hadn’t been completely honest with him either. I always denied any sort of relationship between the ginger and me but that didn’t change the way we met. I was conflicted because I regretted most part of that stupid night but if that hadn’t happened, I wouldn’t be sitting in Matty’s living room and he wouldn’t have become my best friend. "Well, no." I finally answered, this time being me the one breaking eye contact, looking down at my hands in shame.

"Then don't get upset because you're hiding things from him as well." Matty said in a slightly harsh but low voice. I knew it hurt him to give me advice and often I considered cutting him out of my life but I just couldn't. I was such a bad person for using him like this and I really wanted nothing more than for him to meet someone that could make him happy but he refused and I couldn't force him. When I looked up, I was met with his brown eyes that were full with sympathy. I frowned. God, I was such an idiot.

"But it's different, we didn't go all the way and I don't want him to get upset." I tried reasoning, but even I knew that was a bullshït excuse. I didn’t have the right to be mad at Vic for hiding things from me when I clearly had been doing the same. It was hypocritical from my part.

"Have you thought that might be the same exact reason he didn't tell you?" The ginger spoke again, making me squirm uncomfortably in my place while I hugged my legs close to my chest. I didn’t like to talk about this but I had to. "It makes sense, you know." He said again when I didn’t answer and I felt myself pouting while I thought about the harsh words I said before leaving.

“I’m such an idiot, Matty.” I whispered, groaning and resting my face on my knees. I knew I had to fix this but how could I face Vic after everything I said? One thing was for sure, I couldn’t go back to the apartment just yet. I needed to think deeply about my apology. And it needed to be a really good one.

“No, you’re not.” He said, coming closer to me and draping his arm around my shoulders. “But you have to come clean.” That statement made me snap my head up, staring at him with wide eyes. I shook my head. I couldn’t do that, we’d break up for sure and I didn’t want that. Of course I was mad he lied to me but it was a complete different thing for him to find out about Matty. “You have to, Kels. You can’t keep hiding things from each other if you want to fix your relationship completely.”

“I can’t do it, Matty.” I said barely above a whisper, afraid my voice would crack. “He’ll hate me.” I said, while I curled on his side, holding onto his chest as if that would help the shït storm that would surely break when Vic and I talked.

“Yes, you can.” He said running his hand through my hair, the action somehow soothing me instantly. I was exhausted and my eyelids were already feeling heavy before but I knew I’d fall asleep any second now if he kept it up. “Do you want to go home or stay the night?” I heard him ask what felt like ages after. I sighed, sitting up again.

Rubbing at my eyes to try and wake up more, I spoke again. “Can I sleep over, please?” When I looked at him, I saw a little hesitance of his part but eventually he nodded, giving in. I wondered what his deal was but I wouldn't push him, he'd tell me eventually. I shrugged and walked toward his room with him trailing behind me. It wasn't weird for us to sleep in the same bed and honestly I wanted nothing more than to put my mind to rest.

When I saw the bed, I wasted no time flopping on it, burying my head in the pillows. I didn't want to move and I just wanted to sleep like that but I knew I had to change otherwise the suit would get messed up. I groaned while sitting up. I looked at Matty, who was standing by the door still. His bottom lip was trapped between his teeth while he stared intently at the wall, as if he were thinking hard about something.

"Matty?" I asked hesitantly, an eyebrow cocked. "Is everything okay?" I asked concerned, he seemed troubled and I didn't like seeing him like this.

Eventually he came around and looked at me, scratching the back of his head nervously. "Yeah, just." He sighed, never meeting my eyes before speaking again. "Danny's coming over in the morning, so like. At what time are you leaving?" I cocked an eyebrow and it was then that I noticed a small blush covering his cheeks.

I didn't recall Matty mentioning someone with that name. And as much as I searched my head for any clue, I came blank. "Who's Danny?" I finally asked.

"We've been seeing each other lately." He sighed. "I met him at school and he's a senior." He answered instantly, the blush on his cheeks deepening and I instantly caught on what was happening here.

"Oh my god, Matty." I said, excited. "Why didn't you tell me about him earlier? I'm so happy for you, man." I said, hugging him and shooting a bright smile. He let go of me, nodding; his shy nature showing again. "Wait, have guys… you know?" I asked, my eyebrows going up and down teasingly.

"Kellin." He whined, his cheeks turning redder and I laughed at how they matched his hair but I didn't stop, nudging him with my elbow repeatedly. "Stop." He said embarrassed.

"Matty, tell me. I'm your best friend." I whined back, pulling out my puppy eyes while pouting at him. Eventually he sighed and nodded, I swear his face couldn't have gotten any brighter in that instant. "Oh my god." I squealed, my nature showing. I laughed harder when he groaned, going to plop down on his bed and I wasted no time trailing behind him. I sat next to him and never looking away, I whispered. "Was it any good?"

"Kellin! I'm not gonna tell you about my sex life." He said, rolling on his stomach while burying his head in the pillows. "I knew I shouldn't have told you." He complained.

"Oh, come on." I pouted. "Don't be mean, Matty." I sighed, laying next to him while staring at his closed eyes. "So… was it good or not?" I giggled.

"Yes Kellin, it was good." He finally said opening his eyes and looking at me annoyed, but I could see a playful glint in the back of his eyes, which instantly let me know I hadn't actually pissed him off. "Happy now?" I laughed soundly and nodding, walked to the closet, taking the sweatpants I always borrowed whenever I stayed over.

I discarded my suit, leaving me in nothing but sweatpants and white undershirt. I was exhausted so I got inside the covers, pulling them over my head and complaining when Matty draped his arm over my back; squeezing me against the mattress.

"Let go, Matty. I'm exhausted." I groaned, peeking outside the covers and finding the ginger with an amused smile on his lips. Then he crawled inside the blankets with me immediately snuggling closer to him.

He reached above him and turned the lights off. Even when the darkness surrounded us, I couldn't stop my mind from racing, trying to think of an apology but when I couldn't come up with anything, I sighed and gave up. Looking up, I could make Matty's features among the darkness and I noticed his eyes were still open. I knew neither of us were able to fall asleep just yet.

"You really do like him, uh?" I asked in a hushed voice, breaking the comfortable silence that had fallen over us. He sighed and nodded.

"Yeah, Kels." He answered, running his hand absentmindedly through my hair. "He's nice." He continued after a couple moments of silence and I nodded. I could feel myself relaxing, falling asleep slowly.

But before I fell completely asleep, I couldn’t help but to think about the way Matty talked about this Danny guy. It reminded me a lot when Vic and I started seeing each other. I longed for those days and I wanted nothing more than to go back when everything was alright. But now everything was a mess and I hated that. I hated that after the year he went away, the trust we built had completely gone to trash. I just hoped we could fix this.

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I'm sorry? for not updating bc I was in a strike at uni and bc of this but ye. Pls comment and vote, it makes us happy :)))