I love you, always did, always will (Jensen Ackles x Reader)

Chapter 18

After you decorated your whole apartment you and Jensen decided to watch Christmas movie, getting more into a Christmas mood. You decided to watch 'The holiday' with Cameron Diaz, you totally loved this film.

You were holding a bowl with popcorn and eating it. Jensen has his arm wrapped around your shoulder, pulling you close and resting his head on yours. You loved sitting and cuddling on the couch.

You could doze every time in this position and you almost did, but for your luck the end credits started playing and Jensen shifted and looked if you already were asleep. "Your up?" he whispered and kissed your temple. "Yeah." you said half asleep.

"Let's get you to bed." he said and scooted you up in his arm. "Jensen I could have walked." you mumbled into his chest and put your arms around his chest. "Maybe, but I like caring you into our bedroom." and you could hear the smile in his voice, which made you smile too.

He lied you down and crawled next to you, pulling his arm around your waist and resting his head in the crook of your neck. You immediately fell asleep and he did the same.

~the next morning~
You woke up from someone ringing the doorbell, you looked at the clock. It was 9am. Who was ringing the doorbell that early? You looked to your right, Jensen was asleep like a rock and didn't care about anything. His arm still wrapped around your wait and you tried to get out of his hold.

Finally you succeeded you took your sweater from the chair in your bedroom and slipped it on as you rushed towards the door. You opened the door and frowned, "Donna?" "Hey sweetie." she said and walked inside giving you a peck on the cheek and a quick side hug.

You closed the door and rubbed your eyes from sleep and looked at her frowning. Did Jensen forget to tell you she was coming or why was she here? You smiled at her, "Donna what are you doing here?" "Visiting my son and his lovely girlfriend." Yeah she said girlfriend because to be honest you and Jensen told no one except your friends from work and Jared.

"You wanna drink something? " you said and walked into the kitchen, she followed suit. "Yeah a water please." you grabbed a glass out of the shelf and took a water out of the cupboard, filling it. You gave it to her and she choked on her water after she took a swig of it.

"Are you alright?" you said and rubbed her shoulder as a sleepy Jensen entered the kitchen. "Good Morning Y/N and mom." he said sleepy and grabbed his mug filling it with coffee "Mom?!" you let out a small laugh. He placed the mud in the counter and rushed towards her, embracing her in his arms.

"What are you dong here?" he asked. She didn't talk she was still shocked. "Are-are you two engaged?" she said and pointed at your left hand and you felt as the best rushed to your cheeks. Jensen scratched the back of his neck. "Actually yes." he said and let out a breath.

"Why didn't you guys tell us?" "Because it wasn't important." Jensen shrugged and took a sip from his coffee. Donna looked at you and you also shrugged.

She looked like a fish gasping for air with her mouth closing and opening, "N-not important? You two gotta be kidding me." Jensen wrapped an arm around your waist, "Actually we wanted to tell you at Christmas." he said.

Of course for you and Jensen the engagement was important, but it was more special to you and him. You wanted to tell them, but more as a surprise and Christmas was the best occasion. 

She just gave him a glare and looked at you with a lovely expression, she loved you like a second daughter, "How are you sweetie?" "I am good, how are you?" she smiled at you. "I'm glad you are, I am good too." "Mom what are you doing here?" Jensen asked her with narrowed eyes. 

She would never visit without telling or asking him. She took a deep breath, "You know your aunt Millie lives here right?" Jensen nodded slowly. "She got in an accident." you looked at him and saw how everything fell out of his face. She was his favourite aunt.

"Is-Is she okay?" he asked and his grip on you tightened, he was afraid to hear something more worse. "She's in a coma." she said and looked at her glass with water. "Since when do you know that?" he asked angry and with gritted teeth.

"Since yesterday." she said and looked up at him. You hugged Jensen tightly and he rested his head in the crook of your neck and you heard him sniffling. Your heart ached for him. "Everything is gonna be fine." you tried to cheer him up slightly and drove your head up and down his back. 

He nodded against your neck and hugged you tighter and a moment later he let go of you. You cupped his cheek and wiped his tear away, smiling at him. You got on your tip toes and gave him a peck on his lips. 

~*~

You all sat in the room of his aunt and waiting for a doctor. Jensen was pacing the room and you sat there watching him as suddenly Donna took your him and you looked at her with a weak smile. "You really love him." she said with a smile and you frowned slightly, of course you did.

She saw your frown and rubbed the back of your hand, "You're wondering why I told you this. I said it because the way you look at him is the way I look at him and it's the way I look at my husband." she whispered so Jensen couldn't hear. 

You smiled at her with a slight blush, "I do. I really love him." you smiled shyly at her. "No need to blush." she said with one of her loving smiles, but before you could anything more the doctor entered the room. 

"Mister and Misses Ackles?" "Yes." Jensen and his mom answered at the same time. "Misses Miller is in a coma and as it seems,-" he took a deep breath and Jensen looked at him with a scared expression and you stood up. You walked towards him and took his hand. 

"-She won't wake up. The car accident she was in, was really bad. I am sorry." Jensen squeezed your hand and you felt so sorry for him. "And there's nothing you can do?" you asked the doctor. "Waiting, just waiting. I know it happened yesterday but it looks really bad and I am sorry." "Can I see her tomography?" was all Jensen said and you knew he didn't trust the doctor.

"Are you a doctor?" "Yes we both." you answered for Jensen. "I'll be right back." he said and was out of the room. A few minutes later he was back with her tomography and gave it Jensen. He looked at it with narrowed eyes and gave it to you while he looked at her brain tomography. He let out a breath of relief, her brain was okay. 

"Her brain seems alright so there's still hope." he said and you were focused on her body tomography, he organs were shutting down and you felt your stomach tightened. There was nothing you could do anymore and you felt bad for telling him this.

"Jensen-" he looked at you with his worried green orbs and you felt tears welling up your eyes and his mom was staring at you what made you even more nervous "-her organs are starting to shut down and it seems like her heart is also really weak." you said as a tear rolled down your cheek.

Both of them looked at you with a hurt expression and you felt so sorry, "What does this mean?" Donna asked you. You took a deep breath, "It means that her heart is too weak to pump the blood that is with oxygen through her vital organs." you said with a weak smile and looked at the tomography one more time.

"But her heart was already damaged before, did you guys know that?" you asked them and they looked at you like their brain was blank. Jensen you looked at with an unreadable expression.

"So does this mean she had heart attacks before?" his mom asked you and you nodded. "Why didn't she tell us?" she mumbled mostly to herself as she looked at her sister. 

~*~

You were back at home both of you lying in bed, he with his head was on your chest and an arm wrapped around you. You played with his hair as you suddenly heard him quietly sobbing into your chest, "Jensen?" you asked quietly and his grip on you tightened.

"Hey." you said softly and cupped his cheek as you lifted his head. You saw his red and puffy eyes and wiped his tears away. You felt sorry and also didn't know what you should have said without making him feel worse. "She is so important to me. I wanted her to be at our wedding." he said sobbing and rested his head back on your chest.

"I know Jay." you said and drove a hand through his hair and tried to soothe him down a little bit. Your heart ached so much for him. He cupped your cheek and kissed you lovingly and let you know how much he loved you and how important you were to him.