Teach me

The past

So, you know that feeling you get when you realize the horribleness of your reality and the sadness it surrounds? That intense heat at the bottom of your stomach, where you feel as though a knot is tied strongly but loosely as well, ready to fall apart any minute. The pain in your head, as you are trying your best not to cry or let any tear drop, in order to hide away your sorrow. The numbness after everything ends, and the need to repeat the circle and cry all over again.

Sadly, everyone has. For one reason or another, we do havw this breaking moment, this empty experience that we wish to never relive again. If anything, Seokjin had promised to himself that he will never be left feeling a way as such. Thus why he was always prepared for everything, and planed ahead, and made programs and planners and drafters, while always living in the fear of the erratic. Oh, the unpredictable, how truly frightening it is to some.

However, life is a bitch, as they say. It slaps you when it is less foreseeable, and then kicks you shamelessly when you are down. It always takes advantage of your darkest fears and scariest thoughts, molding them into reality.

Terrifying, isn't it? To be alive but at what cost? Always dreading for the unexplainable.

Seokjin did not expect the crash as well. He honestly thought he looked both ways, before deciding to cross the road. He could swear he checked twice even, as a habit of his always present anxiety.

But he was wrong. So, so terribly wrong.

The first drops of rain had already fallen, causing Seokjin to grumble under his breath.

"Come on Yeeun, we will be late to our planed date!" Seokjin giggled, holding his wife's hand tightly in his gigantical bigger one.

"Jeez, Jin, keep calm. It's not that big of a deal if we arrive late for once in our life!" she answered him quite annoyed, but nonetheless childly excited as well for their little date night, chuckling and putting her tiny hand in front of her lips, in an attempt to hide her bold happiness.

"Fuck she is beautiful" he thought and smiled, admiring her from afar. "How was someone like me so lucky to catch you, love?"

As he crossed the street quickly, so that they could get to their restaurant as fast as possible, he was lost in her eyes and didn't happen to notice the sudden car that was driving by, a neglect he would regret for years on.

That's when the car crashed, when he felt his feet swiping of the ground, Yeeun's hand leaving his own and her touch losing his forever.