Broken Girls And Broken Boys

Chapter Thirty Two: You've just broken mine.

A/N this book is nearly finished!! All the parts are being published today so enjoy! Also thank you for putting up with my crap update schedule! I know these chapters have been rough but I will go back and edit them next year! Love you all xx

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"Can we talk?" I stop before my door at the sound of his question. Frozen. I don't know how to feel when I hear his voice. It's a sickening mixture of guilt and regret- for hurting him.

"Brody I don't think that's a good idea," I reply, not wanting to turn around to see his face. I don't want to see the pain in his eyes. The pain I caused.

"I want to talk to you Kendall. I think you owe me."

I feel like I've been punched hard in the gut. I stumble back from the door and turn to face him. Shock hits me when I meet his gaze.

Bruises are scattered across his face,  each one a reminder of the punches he endured from Grant. Because of me.

Brody registers my expression and smirks slightly. "Don't be too worried Princess I threw a couple of punches myself. I'm a big boy now."

"As if that makes it any better," I mutter, pulling my coat around me tighter to stop the wind nipping at my body. 

Brody steps towards me until we're both on my porch,  staring at each other and not saying anything. I don't know what to say. How to start this conversation.

"I'm sorry," I'm shocked to hear the words flow from his mouth.

"Why? You have nothing to be sorry for you didn't do anything this was me. This mess was me Brody don't you get it-" he cuts me off.

"That's not true Kendall," he mutters and I know it's his attempt of trying to soften my anger towards myself but it won't work. There's too much pain buried in me to let it all go.

"Nothing you will say will make me feel better-" I try to argue but he cuts me off once more,  more abrupt this time.

"No Kendall I don't think you get it. It was me. I did this. I started this. Because I'm hopelessly in love with you."

I step back from him,  unsure of how to process this information. Brody. In love. With me?

"I don't understand.  You like Serena. You're with her-"

Brody sighs and runs a hand down his face,  over the bruises scattered across his cheeks. "No I'm not. I was just trying to make you jealous. And then you got with Grant and you were so happy. And I couldn't understand how he deserved someone as amazing and beautiful as you."

"But me and Grant weren't-"

I'm cut off once more and confusion is running through my body like adrenaline.

"So I destroyed it. I didn't think it would work. I thought you two were strong and that I'd just have to settle for another girl and that I would've lost my last chance to have you again,"

I take another step back. "Wait, you..."

"I got Serena to call him up crying and meet with him and kiss him. And then she started the rumour about him sleeping with her," he tries to reach out to me but I pull away,  not wanting to be anywhere near him.

"I didn't think you'd actually call me.  But you did. And I had you back. And then you told me you regretted it and I realised that I would never have you. Because you love him. And I broke that apart."

Hot angry tears are rolling down my cheeks and I have no idea what to say.  How can I express how much I'm hurting all because of his selfish actions.

"You ruined everything Brody. I felt safe with him. I trusted him. I was gonna tell him about my dad and the mess that is my life and you. You destroyed it all. For what? To get me in your bed?"

"No Kendall it's not like that. I love you. I love you so much and you broke my heart."

"Brody," he meets my gaze, watching as tears roll down my cheeks, almost mimicking the way they fall down his own face. Pain is pouring through my body and I don't want to say anything at all. I don't want to cry in front of him. Or show him how much he's hurt me. Or let him know how much sadness in deep set in my heart. But I do.

"You've just broken mine."