Knock Me Down - [COMPLETE]

23 - Confession [NSFW]

Long but flavorful, steamy chapter. This is like 70% Jasper and Mateo being gay.

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"You're looking at getting drunk and making memories all wrong. It's making memories so good, they take too much file space in your brain" Holden pokes my forehead, drink in hand, "...that they can't be saved there. It's a sign that you had a good time"

It's enough to make me grin but I'm not drinking, being here is ethically taxing enough.

"I gotta sneak back into my house, mate. I have bad coordination during the day sober, but at night, drunk and climbing my house is the easiest way to score a date to the ER"

I see Connor in the crowd, not dancing with anyone but with himself. Usually if a slow song was on he'd be with some guy probably hoping to take Connor home unaware that he wouldn't let them touch him. He waves at me and I give him a flick of a nod, a smile and then I look over at Holden who 's waving back.

"You guys getting along better?"

He takes a swig of his beer and moves his head side to side like there isn't a yes or no answer to that, "We're alright. He's stilling fucking exhausting. But I'm getting used to it"

He says it with humor and I can see through the blasé tone. Holden already considers him a friend.

The lights change, a sign that the band was starting. Connor joins us. They're wearing costumes again. Gen is Sally from the Nightmare Before Christmas, Sayen's in a very pretty version of the Grinch make up probably done by her girlfriend, Cas is in the classic Mean Girls Jingle Bell Rock outfit (heels and all), Hudson was in the ugliest, over decorated Christmas sweater I've ever seen, and Jasper was Jack Frost. His hair was sprayed icy white and wasn't in its usual waves.

Jasper's the first to make a move. Playing simple notes on the guitar.

"Fuck yeah, Christmas music" Connor shakes my shoulder excited. It didn't seem like their style.

Cassius gets a few whistles at his outfit. He takes the microphone in his gloves hands and shortly whispers, "Merry Christmas, sinners"

I realized they wouldn't be playing just any Christmas music.

"Oh, Santa, I've been waiting on you" Jasper sings first.

"That's funny kid, because, I've been coming for you" Cas sings back taking on the roll as Santa Clause in the song, even adding a bit of a gruffness.

"Oh Santa, I've been killing just for fun~"

"Well the party's over kid. Because I—I got a bullet in my gun"

"A bullet in your what?" Jasper replies and I laugh with everyone else.

Jasper speeds up and Genysys quickly and aggressively finesses the guitar. It's 'Dont Shoot Me Santa' by The Killers. I'm willing to bet Cassius picked it too. Alt-Christmas it is.

"Don't shoot me Santa Clause
I've been a clean living boy
I promise you, did every little thing you ask me to
I can't believe the things I'm going through"

They don't sing a single, normal Christmas song.

"You guys are terrifying" I say to them entering their dressing room after their performance, mostly referencing when they last sang This Christmas by Set It Off. Hearing Cassius sing something typically very punk rock scarily well was shocking even if he didn't have the nasally sound to do it.

Holden laughs, "I have never seen a crowd dig Christmas songs since the last time I went caroling with my mom's suburban church friends when I was ten singin'  'O Come, O Come, Emmanuel' with all the other white moms"