Shadows

Punishment

Closing my eyes, I decided it was best if I just lay there for a moment… become consumed with the pain. This was a regular thing from her when we were in school… but she’d gotten stronger since… so obviously the blows hurt more. Deciding it was time to get up I clutched my stomach with one hand whilst using the other as a lever til I could shimmy my knees underneath, using those as support instead. Once on my feet I began to limp forward, I could barely breathe and I could barely see… she had damaged something this time… I was sure of it.

  The more I walked, the more I wanted to be sick… my eyes darted all around me, making sure that Serena and the gang were not anywhere to be seen before turning a corner, I used to feel so scared in school when they ganged up on me… now it just pissed me off, I felt so annoyed that I was so weak… unable to do anything for myself. I couldn’t take it anymore, as soon as the bile reached my throat I threw up, the contents of my stomach flew out in a jet stream… I stumbled, expecting to land in the pile of sick but thankfully I grabbed onto the post next to me.

  Straightening myself up and wiping the excess sick of my lips I started to walk home again, I began to wish that I had a damn car… it would save so much time and would be really handy right now, but with the Government being the way it was and insurance, MOT and the actual bloody cost of the car… it was near enough impossible to buy one… stupid really. It was the same with going to university, I said I was only going to have a gap year and THEN apply… but I just can’t afford it… and I certainly don’t want to lend money off my parents either. Looking around at my surroundings I saw that I was back by St James’ church… not long now and I would be home… thank God for that one.

  I couldn’t wait to get home and just flop down on my bed, at least then I would be safe, I would be far away from these monsters that thought they were doing good by punishing me… when in fact I’ve done nothing wrong except be different, and for being different I was called a freak. Once more I found myself doubling over from the pain, pleading to God to make him take the pain away. I gripped onto the side of the wall nearest to me, peaking around the corner… there she was… sat on a bench with Leon, sticking her venomous tongue down his throat, this was the only way home for me… shit. Sucking in breath and forcing myself to stand up straight I began to walk in their direction, praying she wouldn’t see me, making sure I didn’t look her way I held my head up high and began to faux a strut.

“Is that?” I heard her whisper, her tone was evidently angry… but I think she was more surprised to see me standing, it wouldn’t be long before she caught up with me

“Let her go Serena, you’ve done enough today” I heard him call after her, she gave a very exaggerated grunt so I assumed she’d gone back to him… ‘Thank you’ I mimed to myself.

  Once my house was in sight I could not withhold the smile that spread across it, I was so close to safety, so close to that nice warm bed of mine. Eventually I pushed through the front gate, walked along the garden path and tried the handle… it was locked… shit, then I remembered… they were going out for a meal, quickly reaching around in my bag I noticed that I didn’t pack my keys, getting more and more frustrated with myself, I kicked the plant pot nearest to me… a key pooped out… then once more realisation hit me that we always kept a spare somewhere outside. Cringing as I bent down, I scooped up the key and unlocked the door. The house was quiet yet that felt just perfect… quiet was always best. Shutting the door behind me I decided to leave it open as I bet Hannah would want to come home for dinner, yet if she didn’t the door was open for her when she comes home later anyway.

  Struggling my way upstairs I headed straight for my bedroom to dump my things down before turning to the bathroom, I knew what I would need at the moment… bed was not it. I ran the water in the bath; it would warm up in a few minutes so I put the plug in… that would cool the water so it would be nicer than scolding myself…  I can thank mother for that little tip. Locking the door and stripping my clothes off I began to admire the nice lump that was now on my stomach… that was going to bruise and stay there for a bloody long time.