Shadows

Dance

It was fast approaching the ball and I was once more on my feet and learning to dance. Considering that I hadn’t heard of half of the dances I was picking them up pretty quickly. Dimitri commented that he was impressed by the rate I practically ‘mastered’ some of the dances. Once or twice I was pulled to the side by Anna who urged me to tell Dante on how I felt, but I shook my head and explained to her that I had my reasons for withholding.

“It’s not fair on him” she pushed

“I don’t care, I have my reasons” I stated before strutting my way back to Dante in the centre of the ball room. I wanted to spend more time on this dance mainly because it was my favourite; the memories behind it although not entirely pleasant were in my past.  Once more he grabbed my waist and one hand whilst I gently placed my free hand on his shoulder; he was a little rougher than usual this time. “Easy!” I yelled at him, my reply was a cheeky wink and click of the tongue. We twirled and whirled til the cows came home… or rather til blisters began to form on my feet.

“Awww just one more dance please!” he begged me, pouting and smirking all at the same time

“No, my feet hurt! You don’t have to wear heels!” I laughed

“Please” he begged once more, I folded my arms and shook my head whilst trying to maintain some sort of serious expression… like hell did that work out. He ended up scooping me up by my knees so that he was holding me in his arms before swinging me around like a lunatic. I screamed whilst laughing that he put me down, yet he blatantly refused.

  He finally stopped spinning and stared at me deeply in the eyes, our foreheads touched… an inch away from kissing.

“Sorry” Seth interrupted “But your father wants both you and me in his study”

“Can’t it wait” he muttered, not once averting his eyes from mine

“Unfortunately it cannot, he says it’s urgent” Dante grunted yet gently lowered me down and kissed me on the top of my head before turning on his heel to leave. Once he was gone I sat down on the floor, kicked off the heels I wore and began to rub my feet. I looked around to see that everyone had left me alone in this room, my feet were still aching but I felt like more dancing. So after stretching outward and upward I sat myself up and began to attempt ballet… yes ballet. I envisioned myself listening to a soft piano piece such as ‘Claire de Lune’ by Debussy or ‘Kiss the Rain’ by Yiruma; it was easier to picture the moves and how to flow that way. My body seemed to swerve and swoop, twist and turn, bend and contort… it was beautiful.

  My mind whirled back to the pictures of my parents as I danced, I wondered what my life would have been like if I had been with them… would it have been on the run from the hunters and slayers all the time or would it have been something of magic and actual wonder? Would I be the person I was now? Would I be heartless? Would I be stronger? I knew that I would be loved, that was for sure… it was heart-breaking to know that my father had been taken from me like that. I actually felt sick to the pit of my stomach at the recollection of what my mother wrote that they had been so careless as to kill a mortal. Why did they need to kill every Vampire and Dhampir known? Not all were bad and some loved humans as though they were their own… I mean come on they accuse Vampires of being heartless creatures of the night yet they killed most of their kind without warning or even a solid reason. I was not naïve to think that Vampires were fluffy beings… but it was just sickening.

   I stopped dancing and wiped the tears that fell from my eyes, I hated crying over things like this

“I never knew you could dance ballet Victoria” I jumped as I realised I was not alone. It was Armand; he had probably come in this room to start planning the décor or something… but to know he had just witnessed my little display, it was rather embarrassing.

“I can’t, well I’m not any good anyway” I replied sheepishly, my cheeks already burning

“Don’t be so modest child, you are really good” he walked over across the room but stopped an inch away from me, I could feel the cold radiate from him. “Did you used to take lessons?” I shook my head

“No, self-taught. That’s why my moves are so rigid and rusty”

“That is quite an accomplishment child, and you are not at all rigid. You move with elegance and pride. It is most beautiful” he smiled at me as his eyes twinkling with an emotion I didn’t understand.

“Where are the others, Seth said you had some business to discuss with them?”

“I did, but then sent them on their way” I nodded solemnly; I knew I shouldn’t feel disappointed that he didn’t come right back but my heart sank at that moment. It was silly to think that he didn’t have a life of his own “Don’t look so glum child” he chuckled as he placed a hand on my shoulder “You should keep practising though, you’ll get even better” he released my shoulder and made his leave, only turning around once to smile.

  Once I was sure I was alone again I carried on, willing my body to bend and contort in ways it hasn’t before. Closing my eyes I fully loosened up, rose up on my toes, froze, took a deep breath and attempted to do some fouettes. After about twelve of them however I heard something pop and fell to the floor panting. I was so out of shape it was unbelievable. Scowling that I could not complete anymore I rubbed my aching and close to bleeding feet.

“Damn it!” I yelled, punching the floor in anger which only resulted in more pain… not the best idea in the world.

“Easy Vicki” a smile made its way across my lips. It felt good to have him near me again “And from what father just told me” I spun around as he pointed to his head “You were doing some very fancy ballet just a moment ago” he smirked

“Shut up” I laughed, nudging his shoulder “I’ve said it to your father and I will say it to you, I’m no good” he moved closer to me until his arms looped around my waist. Pulling me upward I heard him chuckle, how cynically sweet. He held one arm above mine, an inch from touching it. Then, ever so slowly he dipped his hand, touching mine and intertwining our fingers together. His head scooped down and his lips brushed my neck, fangs grazed but never drew blood. Turning slightly his one knee nudged my inner leg causing it to rise, once risen he spun even more making us turn on the spot. He was making me feel crazy inside, I wanted to turn around and just kiss him there and then… but I couldn’t. I couldn’t be cheated like that again.

“Stop” I whispered

“What’s wrong?”

“Just stop” he released me fully from his grasp and I stepped away from him, he looked pained and hurt at first so I put my fake emotion mask on and smiled, which seemed to give him some sort of reassurance “I’m tired that’s all” I walked over to my heels and picked them up, turned to him to smile, then made my way towards the grounds. A bit of fresh air would do me good.

  I dropped my heels at the door, opened it and walked outside. It hurt to walk on the gravel outside but I knew it would hurt more should I chose to wear the heels again. The ground was rough and cold yet I loved how it was able to somehow soothe and relax me. I hopped onto the nearest patch of grass and sighed, it felt silky smooth, cool and even tickled them a little which resulted in me laughing. I stretched upward and gazed at my arms and hands… they looked a little plumper these days, which was probably from all the food that Anna was shoving in my mouth on a regular basis. My colour however remained the constant ‘Casper’ tone that it had always been. Knowing why now made it a little less frightful. I felt bad for lying to Dante back there… it wasn’t his fault that I was so messed up, he wasn’t to know that I had been raped and been cringing away from male contact since. It had only been with him had I truly loosened up, that I let myself feel again… but I knew I could never tell him, it was too risky, especially in his case. Shaking my head and feeling like a fool I made my way back inside, hearing my stomach growl it was time for dinner.