Lauren walked in rush through the cold city of Los Angeles on the way to the building of her apartment... the skies above were turning grey as she felt as if a few droplets of drizzle fell on her forehead. She frowned wishing it's just a normal water phenomenon from the trees' dew that she's passing on to and not really about to rain. Squeezing her own self, the thin little hair of her skin underneath her coat are all standing up no matter how thick the fabric was. It's like they're all coming to take her warmth. She hissed in coldness, ending up on hugging herself after the freezing breeze of L.A. blew on her face... her jaws clenching to prevent her lips from trembling. She's not really used to a cold environment considering that she's living in Miami her whole eighteen years of existence. But yeah, she's in L.A to finish her college.
The thought made her pinch the bridge of her nose which is covered by a little freckles after remembering that her mom will kill her once she found out that she didn't pursue her chosen course. It's not like she would be killed because they paid for her tuition... Lauren worked hard to pass their exams and to study her college with that school... she didn't exactly thought that she will pass and considering that she did, her father drove her to Los Angeles for almost forty hours and took a flight to go back to her hometown, Miami. Of course they will be mad because Lauren wouldn't graduate, specially her mom, but that's the last thing in her mind right now.
She just think that art isn't for her since she's fully color-blind and there's no color that exists through her eyesight except black and white.. the thought made her cringe. Yes there is a thing called sketch artist.. but Lauren had loved art ever since she was just a child.. it's a thing she's born with. But when she turned six, the color of her sights slowly fade away. Just by being reminded of that mere memory made Lauren even more sure that she doesn't want to go college with her colleagues that can definitely see colors. You can't really blame her. She likes Art, even love it. But as time passes by, it made her confidence go down.
She also often experience art-block and losing motivation too. And with that, slowly... she can't find the spark anymore.
Being an Artist is easy, specially when you truly love art, but being color-blind? Who said it is? Art needed colors and color is Art but... what is Art if everything is black and white? What is Lauren in the terms of Art?
What is Lauren without art?
The question made Lauren's head to lift as the sole of her shoe scratched the ground with a harsh sound at the sudden urge to stop walking... who am I without Art? - she asked herself.
Without art, she's probably jailed in her room with sad songs that keeps on playing because Music is the second passion of hers. She's not confident enough with her voice though.. but she can surely write songs... sad songs that she keeps on writing lately. She tried to remember how many CD of her records she has in her room. She can't sing confidently enough and she knew that. So why not sell them? That way, she could pay for her apartment rent or something. It is mo joke that the loving expenses in America is too much. If Lauren just slack at home, she might starve herself to death. Dear Lord, she's just eighteen.
Her parents discussed that they'll send her some money through credit card to provide her needs or anything, but they're also not certain about it because they're getting poor financially. She doesn't want to be of any burden though, so alone in a big city with no enough money, Lauren thought of having a second job if it is not enough.
She again walked with complicated stuffs in her head but then snapped out from her own reverie and thoughts when she walked passed by people that is circled to an entertainer watching something... she furrowed her brows in curiousity. There's a long murmurs that she barely understand and people's shoes tapping on the ground but it is not that long when she heard a strum of guitar later on and a sound of a woman singing
YOU ARE READING
With You, I'm Everything But Colorless
Random"Look at you, skinny girl.. you look like a skeleton!" She heard a guy said then laughed Lauren just shook her head... she doesn't understand why people who had a good eyesight can't see the beauty in everything.. she really doesn't understand why t...
