With You, I'm Everything But Colorless

Chapter 2

That night, Lauren was left alone again in her apartment- pinching the bridge of her nose in attempt to concentrate on her sketch pad. Because after the scene happened near the abandoned building of burned apartment earlier, she can't seem to focus anymore. And with that, she regretted meeting the girl... Lauren twist her pencil, doing tricks with it. No! I shouldn't regret it! After all, I helped her from human-beings who's insulting people, because I hate it!- she thought to herself... yes, she don't regret it and will never will, but she hates thinking of the girl to the point where she can't focus anymore

'Is she okay?'

'Does she have any jacket?'

'Does she have a warm place to sleep in?'

'Does she have someone to take care of her?'

'What if... those men come and hurt her again?'

'Can she fight or defend herself from them?'

'Will she even fight them?'

'Will she be... okay?'

Lauren doesn't know what the answer to those questions. Part of her wanted to see her to answer all of it but on the other hand, she doesn't like the idea because of the possibility of being unfocused once again..

Wait. Seeing her would answer them right? And it won't distract her again once she answered them.

Yeah it really is- she thought, hoping to see Camila tomorrow or any other day again

She smiled unknowingly while tapping her fingers on her study table, counting how many times she tap as she tryna imagine the sound it would produce once she has her hands on her piano... Lauren needs to produce many music to sell for the students or anyone.

For others, it's hard but she enjoys it.. she enjoys listening to songs and even making it.. but yeah.. she's not confident enough with her voice

Turning to her sketch pad, she smiled sadly at the figure she had drawn... it shows a beautiful face of a girl singing with the guitar. She had her eyes close with the gleam of tear on her left cheek... her body is slim and she wore a jersey with her dusted jeans, and they were partnered by an old converse shoes... the drawing is realistic. It is not finish yet and she knew that once she finished the nose and lips, the color will be the only one missing. But sketch is sketch and usually, sketch don't have any colors. Lauren shrugged ignoring the fact that she won't see colors anymore (well, except for having Enchroma glasses, it's expensive tho).

She used to believe that- yeah... she's color-blind, and it doesn't mean that she can't keep on going and doing what her passion is. And one thing, being color-blinded does not define yourself... it is a part of her and would never change so why not just love it and appreciate the world?

But now she doesn't even know anymore. Everything does not make sense

Because for her, the advantages of being color-blind is you can always see the beauty in everything and would still found any beauty even though that someone or something is not really attractive to look at... the advantage of it is you can appreciate everything even without colors. That was the advantages of being color-blind is, for her at least.

And yet right now... She barely appreciate a thing. She sometimes cries about it at night where she can feel everything.

Lauren sighed as she closed her sketch pad standing up and walking to the window... it's been a month since she moved here. Yet she's still not used at living alone.

It makes her sad, but somehow the skies she admired above where beautiful stars and moon are standing proud despite the darkness behind, comforts her... she then let out a shaky breath as she sat on the windowsill