I Wanna Be Yours (Arctic Monkeys Fanfiction)

28) The morning after, the night crying

I wake up, to the sound of softly playing music. I realize I'm sitting up--I blink my eyes slowly, and then I feel a hand running through my hair. I close my eyes back again and lay down, realizing I'm in a car. 

"Morning, love," Alex mumbles and it gives me a bit of shivers. A smile plays on my lips. 

"Morning..." I sit up, and open one eye to my left towards him. Morning sunlight peers through the window just right and lights up his face to a golden. I inhale sharply. 

"How was your sleep," he whispers, smiling sheepishly. He tries to focus on me, but also on the road as well. "I wanted that perfect morning-after cuddle, but the building we rented was due and the guy to kick us out would've been less pleasant, I suppose," he chuckles, and I see a little bit of his 2007 laugh in it. 

I grin. "Perfect." Then I realize all of what happened last night... and I'm blushing furiously. 

"What are you thinkin' 'bout, darlin'?" he smirks. 

"Nothing," I mumble-laugh, flutters in my chest. I can barely think. Dry mouth. You know, the usual symptoms of love. 

"Tell me. I want to hear all your thoughts, every single thing that crosses your mind." Alex whispers. 

Oh sweet Jesus, that was smooth. I tuck a piece of hair behind my ear. What the hell do I say back? 

"We're just on our way back to the band in one of the hotels a couple a miles' way from here. Colin says he's got us in to something huge. But, he always dramaticizes everything," he chuckles. God, I want to ruffle his dark hair. Thoughts back to yesterday make my cheeks go even pinker than before. Wait, what did he say? Whatever. 

"Cool," I smile, barely containing myself. I look out the window and watch as the cars pass by. Alex turns on the radio and classic Beatles' All My Loving plays. 

Could he have tuned in to a better perfect love song to play? I bite my lip and close my eyes. The moment is perfect. 

Alex hums along, a grin on his face. 

* * *

"You have something to tell us?" Colin says snarkily when we walk in. 

Alex raises an eyebrow. "M'not following what you said." He tosses his car keys on the table and flops on the bed. Jamie coughs awkwardly and Matt sits on the hotel desk, Nick in the chair. Colin is tapping his foot by the wall. 

"I mean, is there something you want to tell us, about you two?" Colin says gruffly. 

"Well, we're doing fine, thanks. Do you want to tell us something, about you all?" Alex shrugs. Smart-ass comment, despite the fact that he knows perfectly well what Colin must be talking about. 

Colin rolls his eyes, irritated. "Alex. Don't tell me... you're actually.... involved with this girl. I've been suspecting it for a while. Your acting isn't that good and you'd never do the extra work to act with somebody you didn't like." 

"What's the fookin' problem with it, if I did?" Alex crosses his arms. 

"You can't be serious!" Colin inhales sharply. "I told you from the beginning. The only reason why she's here is to be a decoy. If she's not a decoy anymore, then there's no use for her being here."

Alex takes a step towards Colin, about three and a half inches taller than him. "What the deal? When I was with Alexa or Arielle, you didn't have a problem with my girlfriend tagging along on tour."

Something in the way that he says Arielle and Alexa gives me a pang in my chest. 

"Course not! Leah, no offense, but you're just some fan that happened to be in the right place at the right time. Alex, you don't like her; it's just this stupid plan I had you sign up for that's making you think you are! You were always one for romantic meetings," Colin snaps bitterly. 

Anger wells up inside me. I open my mouth, then close it. If I dare say anything he actually might kick me out. 

"She's not just some fan, Lester," Alex growls. 

"Hey, hey! Break it up you two, we're not the bloody Kardashians, we don't need this drama." Nick stands up. He must've heard something in the tone of Alex's voice. 

Alex clenches his jaw. 

Colin turns to me, unfazed by Alex. "You're going to stage your breakup scene. Tomorrow night."

* * * 

Colin made me get my own hotel room, and he was going to stay with the band tonight to make sure Alex didn't sneak in. I didn't really care much for the guy. 

It was dark out, and I never felt so alone. I made hotel room coffee and took a quick shower, my skin smelling of that soft hotel soap. I tied my hair in a scratchy towel and put on an itchy standard hotel robe, tucked into the bed, and watched payperview. 

I couldn't sleep. No matter how hard I tried. I was pacing by midnight, texting Katie by one o clock--even though she hasn't answered me since the beginning of the summer. I was crying out of frusturation by two. 

Why did we have to stage a breakup scene? Sure, I'm not the ideal Arctic Monkeys girlfirend. I'm not as energetic as Breana, or as sweet as Katie, or as outgoing as Kelly. I get the plan was only for however long the media needed to think we were a couple, and then for me to leave... I leaned my head against the cool glass door to the hotel's balcony, and stepped outside. 

It was freezing. Well of course, I thought. It was November now. I didn't stay out for long, but I was hoping Al would step on to his balcony, and I could see him, but of course he was sleeping. I watched the stars. 

When I came back in, my nose was red. I sat on my bed. I went on my phone and called my mom. 

Ring. Ring. Ring. 

I tried again. 

"Hello?"

"Mum!" 

The woman on the other end paused. "Leah, honey?"

"Yeah!" I was so glad to hear the sound of my mothers voice. Everything seemed to slip away at that moment. I wanted to curl up at mom's house again. 

"I've been trying to reach you for so long. But this guy kept telling me I couldn't talk to you, and you're on TV? Is this a dream?" 

"No, no. It's something I can't talk to you about... " I swallow. I feel bad for not calling. Of course I was homesick but why didn't I at least try to call her? Guilt floods my stomach. "I'm sorry if I'm calling you too late..."

"Nah, no... you can call me anytime," she mumbles sleepily. "I love you so much. I trust you. You're an adult. I mean, not in my eyes. You are twenty three and a half." 

I laugh softly on the phone. "I love you so much mom. I miss you."

Suddenly the calll is abruputly ended. My mom must've fell asleep and hit the end call button. It happens a lot, so I'm not alarmed. 

I let the silence of the hotel rock me to sleep, trying to think of ways to convince Colin otherwise. 

It makes me feel helpless.