Sick of Love Songs (Sean&Kaycee) FINISHED

The one of surrender

Hi! Surprise!

Please read this before you head on to the chapter as I have a bunch of things to say in this particular autor's note.

Firstly, this chapter is my baby. I started this story in September last year and while this is the 55th chapter, it's the only one I have had in my head from the very beginning. This chapter and what takes place in it was largely what made me write this story in the first place and as I'm sitting here and writing this intro, I have tears streaming down my face because it has taken me 6 months to get here. In some ways, it feels like we've made it. I can't tell you how scared I've been of not being able to finish this story because if anything is clear, it's that you've fallen just as deeply in love with my Sean and Kaycee as I have and it breaks my heart while making it whole at the same time. But we made it. Although we still have a few more chapters, this is a milestone I'm incredibly proud of and I hope you're proud of yourselves for sticking around to reach it, too. 

Secondly, this story currently has over 23 000 reads with over 200 of you reading it. There's nearly 2000 votes and countless comments that have made me smile, laugh, cry and swoon and you will always have my deepest gratitude for that. These numbers are insane! If you're one of the people just popping in to read, please consider leaving me a comment this time, even if it's just to say you liked it, or didn't, because I've dreamed of this one for so long. Also, please do vote on all the chapters you've enjoyed so others can find this story too, it would make me incredibly happy. 

Third and last, I know I've said I'm not happy with my chapters or writing on some occasions, but this is not one of them. While it isn't the most emotional or the most tear-jerking or the happiest, it will always be the chapter I come back to read myself. So I hope you'll find the time to sit down, maybe drink some tea or snuggle up in bed and read this one slowly. Every sentence in this chapter hides my love for this story and all of you reading it, so I truly hope you like it and that maybe it stays with you for a while to remind you that it's okay to change your mind, it's okay to be scared and okay to rely on someone and that it's okay to let someone else lead every once in a while. It's okay to be lost and it's okay to ask for help and it's okay to be confused. It's all okay. 

I'll shut up and stop crying now. 

Thank you from the bottom of my heart. 

Enjoy!

Kaycee's P.O.V

The present

"Are you guys ready to peek over the ledge?" Sean asked as if he had no care in the world while my legs were about to give out and I'd be laying flat on my back at his feet. In theory I knew it wasn't the end of the world. I'd be fine, eventually at least, whether I freaked out or not. If I did, I was sure someone would scrape me off the floor and take me home, whether it was Sean himself or any of our friends, because the rational part of my brain was telling me that they were trying to look out for me. The panicking part, on the other hand, sounded something like just lay down on the ground and weep until they show mercy, because they've dragged you straight to hell.

"Hell yes!" Josh shouted, pulling me back from whatever alternative universe I'd gone to. I bit back a smile at his usual ways I'd missed out on during the past year of isolating myself from everyone as everyone else in the room laughed at his antics. These are your people, Kaycee, I tried reminding myself as the distraction faded and it became hard to breathe once again. Involuntarily, my eyes searched for Sean, finding him right next to me where he'd been a second ago, only now he was wound up tightly, as if facing something unpleasant.