Shattered

Chapter 26

Nathan's POV.
It was already one in the morning when I was driving back home in the dark, on my way back from my new hotel's office, I had spoken to Larissa my new finance manager who actually met my expectations work wise, we spoke about how I should approach the situation between me and Alina. The whole day there was tension between the two of us, it was really nice having someone to talk to about this and get their advice.

She didn't want to talk or be near me, I gave her some time alone but it worries me more, this was what happened the majority of the time she was angry, frustrated or in a time of stress. Alina started to shut down socially going into an overdrive of thinking which I knew about, yet in a low time for her I had withheld and utilized that against her, she wasn't even able to control it so why did I make her feel so ashamed?

Dick move, I know, I was just so angry at her... all I wanted to do was celebrate the night with her and make love to her endlessly with a candlelit bedroom, rose pedals scattered with pictures of us from before in a scrapbook that I've made of just her. With every single cherished memory that we're the most meaningful to me.

I didn't need an occasion to show her my love, I'd do it every single day until she got so sick of it that she couldn't bare to be in a room with me. God she drove my mind into insanity but with just one smile— I'd be running back to her.

As I was driving in our neighbourhood there was a smile plastered on my face as I thought of the positive parts, our conflict was something ridiculous that needed to be confronted from both sides. I feel like that me and Alina have the prerogative to be happy, so many obstacles to get through, but I knew that the end destination will be the the best as long as we could get through this.

Me and Alina can get through this obstacle, we're are going to get through this and I'm going to make sure of it. I actually don't know how that is going to work out but I have to think positive for us.

I felt extremely guilty for saying those hurtful words to Alina, I want to apologize, to hold her in my arms against my chest, letting her feel my heart palpitations that comes about when she is near.

No matter what, I knew the truth and that my heart only belongs to Alina, I couldn't guarantee that there wouldn't be any mistakes during this journey but I know that we will make it through to our desired ending. We aren't perfect, we love, fight, make up but when that cycle happens, I believe that we both learn from it and become better versions of ourselves. The moment her French vanilla coffee was spilt on my suit, how she was concerned of my clothes instead of her work pile drew me into her.

Watching her frantically apologize so politely to a stranger, caring for somebody else before she tended to her stuff gave me hope that there are still kind people in this negative world. As soon as her eyes met mine it was like we were both sucked into a whole other universe where it was silence.

The first girl that ever caught my attention, I have a type and she met exactly each and every description, I liked intelligent girls, the ones who are fit, you didn't have to be a mode physique, just active. Showing that you do some self care, good hygiene as well played a pretty big part and a good heart which she has had since the day we've met.

Pulling into our property, it was evoking the beginning of the guilt I've felt for these past few hours away from her, I didn't want to walk into the house seeing her saddened facial features, how she always pinched her lips in a straight line trying to prevent herself from letting her tears fall and the way her lips trembled before a waterfall would follow along with it.

Walking through the door preparing my apology to recite it to her perfectly with no flaws, never in my life have I've ever been this nervous to the point where my hands were fidgeting from the anxiety. Even in conference room's, nothing was more scarier then confronting my wife and wanting her to accept my apology, it was like she was the ruthless 'Mr. Big Boss' as she called me earlier. In the board room I felt superior amongst the other businessmen who would listen to every word that was vocalized by me, with my wife we were equals or— I hate to admit this, I was her bitch. She had full control over me and my decisions, she wasn't strict but for some things yes she was.

She is probably in our room sleeping or relaxing on the balcony, heading up the stairs quickly to find her when opening the large white door the bed was empty, left untouched like it was this morning but the door to our balcony was open. Walking towards the balcony there were only blankets and pillows on the love seat. Where is she then? Looking out, the cars were still here and parked in the same position.

I made the decision to go look around the house for her not being able to wait any longer to get everything out in the open to stop this uncomfortable tension between us. When I got to the kitch the bottle of wine was on our marble counter near the garbage, I grabbed it in my hand noticing it was empty... Alina wasn't one to drink that much, it worries me because she probably would be sleeping somewhere by now but what brought worry upon my body and caused me to build up some sweat was that she was nowhere to be found.

A cold air came from my side, when my eyes trailed to the direction of where it was coming from, the back door was open with the screen door on. I forgot to look in our backyard near our fire pit, she loved it when she first came here and explored the new additions that were incorporated into this property.

Walking out in my backyard I couldn't believe my eyes and the scenery in front of me, what the fuck happened? I look towards the hose that was a mess, then there was a little blood stain on the diving board and— the air was knocked out of my airways when my pool was filled with blood and underneath it a body. Right when I noticed it, realization had hit me in the most abrupt way.

Fuck! I mentally scream in my head, taking off my jacket quickly and throwing my phone out on the deck beside it to jump in the pool to get her, how the fuck did all of this happen when I wasn't even out for that long? It felt weird to leave the house when we had a pretty big fight, I dive into the pool trying to find her body in the blood, it was good that the pool was illuminated with the brightest lights.

Grabbing ahold of her body, I brought her back to our little backyard deck, tapping her face she seemed unresponsive and it was difficult to know how long she has been in the pool. I was in shock, I was scared, I was anxious but now was the time to remain calm because I have a life on my hand. I grab my phone and call an ambulance immediately which they told me they were on there way.

She wasn't breathing so I remembered to perform cpr on her, it's a good thing that I took a first aid course to help with these situations like these, the knowledge of the whole process coming back to me and I was doing it repeatedly until help came to assist. "Come on Alina..." I mumble with stress while doing chest compressions.

It was a repetitive order to follow which soon got me tired, why did it feel like time has slow down right now? "Come on baby, fight for Leo and me..." I didn't even realize that tears had welled up in my eyes at the sight of this, please god, I'm sorry for everything that I've done these past years, I can't promise that I won't make any mistakes but I can promise to try my very best...

After that I was praying just for my Alina to be okay, god had answered my prayer because she started coughing up water and the water soon exited her lungs, she seemed a little out of it when she opened her eyes and was met with my presence. I held her close to me hugging her exhausted body, holding her hand with my other hand that was free it was freezing cold. I grabbed my jacket that I was wearing to drape it over he upper body trying to keep her warm, the fear of causing her pain if she was moved the slightest bit scared me and that was the last thing I wanted.

Blood started to slowly drip down from her head as she was breathing harshly, she lifted her arm to touch her head and winced at a deep cut, when bringing her hand back down there was blood on her hand and then she just passed out. Her eyes shut closed, probably from the impact of whatever she did to her head, the alcohol or the list of blood but I tried to keep her awake.

"Alina? Baby? Are you still with me?" I ask her softly panicking while moving her face towards me. "Alina wake up, baby it's going to be okay..." my eyes started to well up with tears, "we're going to be okay- y-y-you're going to be just f-fine." The tears started to fall while my lips trembled, "come one just hold on a little longer then the ambulance will be here, I promise that after this we could do whatever you want, our life together can't end here..." at this point I was a sobbing mess.

"We will have more kids together, raise a whole fucking soccer team together... J-J-just hold on a little longer..." I tell her kissing her head even though I know she probably can't hear me. Hugging her freezing cold body against mine to give her warmth, all that I was able to do from here on is to wait for the ambulance and pray that they arrive on time.