Autumn (GirlxGirl) | #FREETHESKITTLES

thirty two

        AMANDA and I have spent more time with each other than I ever thought possible.

        Even with everything that had been going on, at that point, my only go-to was my best friend. And it was alright, at least during that time. I had myself pushed back under her window that overlooked the neighbour's roofing. She had changed the curtain, and it now allowed some light to seep into her room translucently.

        Not that it mattered anyway since it was already in the middle of the night when I was crashing at her place.

        Something else had changed in her room as well, and the obvious one was the lack of pink walls. It made the tarantula cage seem like it belonged in the dark green room. I twiddled my thumbs on my phone while watching Amanda brush her hair in front of the new mirror she got that was included with her new closet.

        "You made some changes in here," I voiced out, cutting across the rough sounds of her puffed brush as she stroked her blonde curls carefully. I actually had not been in her room since we spent most of our time in mine, or at the treehouse. One time, we even passed out in my living room watching Friends.

        It was, after all, easier for her to get back home since she drove. But on this specific night, I was sleeping over.

        "Yeah, I did," she responded with a curt laugh, taking a quick glance towards me.

        It had gotten to a point where sometimes, her gazes towards me had me feeling weird. Pulling my legs up to my chest, I could feel just how my stomach bunched up underneath my oversized hoodie. It was sort of pleasant, but not entirely.

        "I needed a change in scenery to find myself, kind of thing," she explained further as she put the brush down on her nightstand.

        "I see," I responded softly with a nod, "are you getting anywhere?"

        "Hmm, maybe you could tell me," she spoke, turning around to face me. She waved her hands from the top of her head to her thighs. "What do you think?"

        I must have looked completely blank because she gave me a raise of an eyebrow. To be honest, I was not entirely sure what she was asking. "What do I think about what?"

        Amanda rolled her eyes and laughed. "Do I look cute?"

        Giving her another look, I could not really tell what was different. Well, maybe the fact that she looked like the best friend I have had in years. She had a major change in appearance in the second half of our Junior year, the glorious months of her prime. Now it looked like we were back to where we used to be, except for a different vibe in the air that could not be shaken off anymore.

        "You look just like you used to," I said in a deeper voice than I meant to. Clearing my throat, I averted my gaze from her and stared back at my phone. One thing that did change was that I was longing for another person in my life, and each time I looked at my phone I just felt deflated. I had not seen or spoken to her in almost a month.

        It did not even matter that time went by so quickly when we were together. It felt like I had known her for a long time, especially when we texted throughout the night until I fell asleep, or when she did. Even the little notes she would give me each time we saw each other meant a lot, because, at one point, she admitted she only did them because she knew it was going to make me smile.

        Autumn was still someone I deeply cared about— you could never imagine. I wanted her to hold me in her arms because it was the safest place I had ever been in. His anniversary was coming around the corner and it was really hard to forget, now that the winter breezes decided they were immediately needed when some of the trees have not lost all their hair yet.