It's Delicious || Lee Taeyong

13| Sober Thoughts and Hiccups

Y/n's Pov:

I closed the door behind me as I reached home. Alone. It was very immature of me running away like that. And I regret it.
I could have simply played a nice girl and walked away.

Duh. Nice going.
Now he'll think you're a stupid little girl who can't control herself.

I am always very late at realising stuffs. Especially when it comes to speaking. I always stood numb during the action but once it's over I think of stuffs and things I could have done or I could have said and I always regret it later. I felt stupid about it. About myself.

I laid myself on the couch. My arm rested against my eyes, trying to ignore the light. I checked the time on my wrist watch and to my surprise, it's only six in the evening. If Taeyong is to return home, he would be home around nine or eight at night.

He is probably hanging around with his girlfriend, I assumed. But it's not like I have feelings for him. I don't want to admit it. But as the days go on, I feel the knot in my stomach grow bigger.
And I shouldn't feel that way. I know. If this doesn't end, it'll be hard for me to stay away.

I turned off the lights and sat up on the couch with my knees curled up to my chest. At least the darkness can be my friend at the moment.

Darkness has always been my friend.

It was past eight and he hasn't arrived home yet. I tried to get some sleep but couldn't. So I stood up, and walked up to the fridge and opened it. I searched for some beverage but found none. So I slammed to door close and opened the freezer on top.

Luck always have been by my side on the tempted hour. I found a bottle which seemed like alcohol. Taeyong might have saved for some occasions but sue that for now.

I grabbed the bottle out of the freezer and didn't bother to even look if I had closed the door of the freezer properly.

I am sure Taeyong wouldn't mind.

I am eighteen now and legal. I wouldn't bother if he walked into me being drunk. I opened the damn bottle open and went straight for it.

'Ah!' I rejoiced as I let the sensation take over me. It's the second time in my life that I am drinking. The first time was when I went to the summer camp at school during my junior year.

It was an accident but I got to taste it. I didn't drink it intentionally. That God damn Haechan swapped our drinks and left me with a glass of God knows what.

Speaking of Haechan, I need to apologize to him at school. I didn't mean to ditch him.

Gosh. I feel so bad today.

I took another sip from the bottle. Then another. I hardly took any break in between that I didn't notice that it was almost empty.

"Another achievement!" I roared.
It was the sadness inside me that took over me. Without any moment lost, there I was, sobbing.

Can't this day get any worst?!

Suddenly the lights of the house lit up. I quickly covered my eyes as I couldn't take the sudden light.

"Ah! Turn it off!" I yelled.

"Y/n?" Taeyong was standing there. At the entrance of the living room.

"Just turn it off!" I yelled again.

He walked over to me. But I couldn't look at him. Was it the lights that prevented me from looking up or was it the embarrassment to face him after all that happened?

He walked over to me and placed his coat and bag over the other couch. He stood there without any words.

"So, how, hiccup, was your date?" I asked as I tried to turn to my left.

"Look y/n-" He leaned closer. I heard him sniff a little, then draw back.

"Oh my god! Y/n, are you seriously drunk?"
He asked. Almost in a scream.

I looked at him straight into his eyes.

Hiccup!

His eyes were dark. And filled with almost regret for something he did.

"So what! Can't I have myself a little treat?" I said, raising the now empty bottle.
"In the darkness?" Without any warning I was sobbing again.

I reached out my arm and pulled him down to the couch, right me to me. He was surely taken back by my action, I could say.

"Hiccup! Tae, do you have any idea how much pain I am going through right now?" I asked.
Hoping for a reply.

I just wanted him to know.

He simply shook his head and I sighed. What else should I expect?

"You wouldn't because you are not me but-" I lowered my voice.
"you know, we are both on the same boat. The same sinking boat."
I looked at him and found him looking straight at me.

"Lonely. A run-away. No family."

"Yeah. I know but-" He paused.
"But that girl was not my girlfriend or anything okay? She dragged me into that carnival."He said in a lowly.

And here I was hoping that he would say something reasonable.

"Why are you telling this to me?"

He scratched the back of his neck.
"I just thought you ought to know."

Hiccup!

"Well, it was you who started all the fuss about my so called boyfriend!" I said as I squished the pillow on my lap.

He narrowed his eyes.

"Oh yeah? Then why were you at the carnival with him when you said you will be going to you friend's place?"He fired.

Duh.

"I didn't go, hiccup, because she was not feeling well and told me to come tomorrow. And moreover Haechan was simply trying to, hiccup, cheer my mood up since you spoilt it in the morning." I replied back.

"Besides, Haechan is my best friend and that is the only thing we'll ever be. He is the only friend I had until high school.' I breathed. My tears were still on the roll. "Yeri came into my life after that. They completed me."

I could sense how he was listening so carefully. Taking every word in.

"It's all because of them how I managed to smile everyday when I was lost in the battle of families. My father."
I completed.

Hiccup.

"I understand" He said, now patting my shoulder.

"I just wanted to say sorry for the morning mess."

A part of me wanted to stay awake but a part of me also wanted to shut my eyes.

Without any warning, I collapsed on his lap and buried my face into the pillow.

"When I wake up tomorrow, tell me that this never happened. I don't want to lose you again."
I felt his hands brush my hair.

Hiccup.

"Taeyong-ah, I really like you. And I want to forget that. If I hold on to that any longer now, I am only going to end up getting hurt again. Hiccup!" I said in a low tone as I closed my eyes.

"I want to forget everything."
Without any words further from me nor from him, I hit myself to my slumber.

I didn't hear what he said or what he did. All I felt was his movements freeze for a moment but then, they were back stroking my hair.

I wish to never wake up again.