two

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EMMA

My first day back at the publishing house is a rainy one. Go figure, I think, holding my bag over my head to protect the sleek bun I styled my hair into. I jog to my parking spot just in front of my new condo, giddy at the thought of having my own parking space, and careful not to sprain an ankle in the shiny black pumps I bought once I officially got the job.

Settling into my car, an older model that I was able to afford without taking out a massive loan, I turn the volume dial on the radio. I listen intently, hoping to distract myself from the jitters in my body. I interned at the place all summer, but this seems different. It seems real. This could potentially be my career. And if one thing's for sure, it's that I want to exceed all expectations.

As the host announces the top five singles out this summer, I feel myself wince internally. This isn't the distraction I had in mind.

"Number two on the charts today... This is 'Emma' by Beau Lewis!" As the host's voice fades into the familiar chords I've heard so many times since the song was released a couple of weeks ago, I jab at the dial with my finger, shutting it off entirely. Hearing his voice won't calm my nerves at all. In fact, my heart beats even faster than it did just five minutes ago.

Seeing Beau at Nana's funeral, it was all too much. When he walked away again, it seemed like wasting the chance I'd spent years hoping for. Asking him to coffee seemed like the natural reaction - I couldn't let him walk away, not when he was right there, in the flesh. It was easy to push him out of my mind when I wasn't hearing his voice over the radio, seeing his green eyes staring into mine. But there he was, and like always, I couldn't say no.

I've gone back and forth with myself hundreds of times since then, nearly convincing myself to call and cancel all together, before pushing the thought from my mind as quickly as it came. Because who am I kidding? It's Beau. I don't think I'll get over it if I don't go - to at least see what could've been.

I let out a deep sigh as I pull into the parking lot of the small publishing house - O'Donnell's Publishing. The owner and CEO, Shannon O'Donnell, is an older woman who inherited the company from her parents and has done a great job expanding the company as the industry has evolved. Still held in an old house renovated to suit the office needs, the environment is comfortable and inviting, one of the things that drew me in right away. It reminds me of Nadine's shop, in a way.

Pushing all thoughts of Beau and our coffee date this weekend from my mind, I grab my purse, holding my laptop and some office supplies, and hurry to the entrance to avoid getting wet.

Once inside, the foyer is exactly as I remember it - warmly lit and decorated in neutral tones, a large wooden desk sitting in one corner, manned by a young woman speaking on the phone, with a spacious sitting area in the other. Large houseplants line the far brick wall, and candles burning on the coffee table keep the room smelling like cinnamon.

"I'll be with you in one moment," The blonde on the phone at reception smiles at me professionally. I don't recognize her from last summer - she must have been hired after I left for the fall semester. She's older than me, but not by much, with light eyes framed by fashionable black framed glasses.

I smile back, and choose a seat. "Take your time." I was told to introduce myself at reception - the office manager would show me to my office, and Shannon would check in with me around lunch time to make sure that I'm settled in and to go over my duties. I grin to myself, prouder than I'll admit to have my own office.

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