The good the bad and the okay I guess(GxG)

I Should Have Stayed In Bed

“I can stop anytime if want to.” said every addict. Now I said addict and you're probably imagining a guy snorting cocaine or a woman pooping pills like it's Candy Crush.

CORRECTION!

We are all addicts.

I, Hazel Elizabeth Johansson am addicted to coffee and biting down my nails till they bleed.

My mom is addicted to her job and Dad loves his whiskey neat. The point is we all have our drug of choice, be it sex, cocaine, coffee, weed, self harm, energy drinks, power, love.

Addiction is built in the DNA of every human being who walks on this planet.

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The image of my dead sister plagues my every dream. No matter how great it starts the dream always ends with me staring at the mirror and my sister staring right back at me, with her pale, ashen face and her bony cheeks.

A mirror to my darker side.

I lurch forward, sweat dripping down my back and my shirt soaked right through. I just had another one of the good dream that always turns bad.

A nightmare with me as the predator and my sister the prey and for survival I tore her to pieces.

The cold air coming from the open window licks at my bare skin, causing me to shiver. I get up from the bed and pull the window in, closing it completely.

My stomach rumbles loudly as I relieve myself in the bathroom.

Chill, it's just pee.

I tiptoe down the stairs, careful to only walk on the left side cause walking on the right side, trust me would wake up the whole neighborhood.

Making it in the kitchen I'm ready for my delicious, scrumptious dinner, hopefully it's grilled chicken. The smell of ash greets my nostrils, as I pull open the oven and it's empty.

Okay, there's got to be some kind of explanation as to why my dinner is not in the oven.

Right?

I close it and open it again and still it's empty. Okay where the hell is my dinner. I open the fridge and I breathe a sigh of relief as I see a lunchbox with a pinky sticky note
that reads.

At least its Double crammed-crust with extra cheese.
-Dad

God bless his soul. I take out the lunchbox and with it a bottle of cold water. At least someone thought of dinner, I wouldn't even be surprised if I would find out that mom is still at work.

What even is the time? The microwave flashes green 00:20.

Tomorrow will definitely be a struggle but on the other hand, a pizza party of one, good music (John Legend) and my Journal doesn't seem so bad.

Fingers crossed nobody ate my Sweet chili flavoured Doritos. I open the top cupboard and there they are, perfect. I stand on my toes, jumping a few times before I manage to drag them out.

BTW I'm not short, just these stupid cupboards.

Before I can tiptoe up the stairs again, on the left side of course I notice that the sliding door to the backyard is open.

Okay so I have two options. A) Leave it or B) Worry the whole night that a burglar will walk in and murder me in my sleep. Okay option A sounds better.

I leave my food on the first step as I navigate myself in the dark. I'm careful to walk far away from the alcohol cabinet, cause the next time my pinkie comes in contact with the corner of that stupid cardboard, it won't survive.