issue six: beg, borrow, steal

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Wilder didn't call me back.

I couldn't sleep that night. How bad had my mom treated him? Had she yelled at him? Insulted him? Knowing my mother she had possibly gone for a more passive-aggressive approach which was similarly damaging. I wasn't sure if I should after everything that had gone down, but I decided to approach him the next day in school.

I stood near my locker the next day, Friday, and gazed at him silently. He was standing a few feet away with his group, intently listening to something Hector was telling him. It was very difficult to get him alone, but I knew I would have to take a chance and worse comes to worst, I would just have to approach him in the middle of everyone else. I hoped and prayed that it would never come to that.

I decided to approach him after classes, and I had more demons to conquer before that.

I sat far away from Cam and Ray in class, deliberately averting their gazes which were trained on me. I had always had an issue with friendships, thanks to the trauma I had endured in elementary school. Every tiny action affected me profoundly, and completely ignoring me and going to the movies made me enraged. 

I left class immediately after it ended and started walking briskly down the corridor. I heard a familiar voice calling me. 

"Nico-"

I increased my pace, pulling the backpack more securely on my shoulder.

"Nico!"

I sped up, almost sprinting along the hallway as Ray called again. "Nicola James Evans! Stop right now!"

I stopped dead in my tracks and sighed, turning around slowly to face them. Ray sighed and walked over to me, her dark hair haywire from the impromptu run. Cam trailed a little further away, his eyes darting nervously around.

"What? Wanna discuss your movie?" I crossed my arms across my chest and glared at them, resisting the urge to pout. She sighed as Cam finally reached us, still not meeting my eyes.

"Nico, we're...we're sorry," Ray began and for a while. I wanted to forgive them. However, I was still too sad. "I...we just didn't know how you would react."

I raised at the eyebrow, "React..to what?"

As if in reply, Camden walked closer to her and stood beside her, his hand finding hers and their fingers intertwining in a way that left nothing to the imagination. He spoke softly, guiltily. "We're together, Nico."

I gaped stupidly. "Together....like...girl and boy?"

"A couple. Yeah," he replied, shuffling his feet sheepishly. "I just...we didn't know how you would reac-"

I felt a familiar ache in my heart. A fear so profound I almost crippled and curled into a ball in the middle of the school hallway.

They would leave me. That was it.

"Oh. That's...congratulations," I said, my stomach twisting in anguish. I had always known it might happen, but the icy shock told me that I had perhaps been in denial. "That's...when?"

"Last night...it was supposed to be a trial thing," Cam said, a blush creeping up his cheeks that made me guilty for the way I was feeling. He smiled. "But...we really enjoyed and we were really compatible. So..."

"That's why we held off telling you," Ray finished breathlessly. "I...we're sorry."

I gazed at their entwined fingers and felt suddenly alone.

I smiled at them, using every ounce of courage left in me to speak the next words. "That's amazing. I think... I think you guys are great together."

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