Chaotic Love

Chapter 13

I was so weak to even pulled myself up to school. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko sasabihin kay Liam na hindi naman ako iyon. I know he'll get very disappointed. I had the chance to admit it wasn't me but I chose to not to.

"Are you okay?" Ella eyed me with curiousity. I know I can't lie to her.

I shook my head. Ikkwento ko na sana sa kanya ang nangyari kaya lang ay dumating na ang Prof namin sa Biochem.

Lunch time came. I received a message from Liam saying that he have a lot of schoolworks to do. Buti na lang. Hindi pa ako handang harapin siya.

"Something's really off." Charm chanted...trying to light up the mood.

Tinaasan naman ako ng kilay ni Ella. Pinili ko talagang umupo kami sa second floor ng paborito naming karinderya. Maliit lang kasi ang space sa taas.

I sighed and started playing with my food.

"Liam thought it was me who's lowkey giving him poems...the reason...why he's suddenly into me." I gulped and tried to meet their gazes.

Kumunot ang noo ni Ella bago inilipat ang kanyang tingin kay Charm pabalik sa akin.

"I...wasn't able to tell him the truth. I'm...scared." Nanghihina kong pag-amin sa kanila.

Rose drunk her glass of water before tapping my back.

"We should be more scared of losing them...than tolerating such lies." Basag ni Rose sa katahimikan na bumalot sa aming apat.

Alam ko naman 'yon. Mas nakakatakot mawala si Liam pero natatakot ako na mawawala siya sa akin dahil sa maling akala niya.

"It should be Charm. Not me." I shyly whispered at them. I feel like I'm a hypocrite.

"I have Dale with me. Liam and I never matched because he's not for me." She smiled...one thing that made me guilty for more.

"If only Liam knew it was you...I am so sure-"

She cut me off and made me looked at her. "Je. Stop being guilty of something you also didn't know. Stop saying that Liam likes you only because of that poem-"

"Charm, those poems were you being confident enough-"

She shook her head, making me to not to continue what I was about to say.

"Those poems were written for the wrong person, Je."

"You should tell Liam about this." Ella said breaking her silence. Mukhang pinag-isipan niya talaga ang kanyang sasabihin. "Most relationships failed because they don't know how to communicate with each other." She shrugged her shoulders.

"True to life ba?" Rose said teasing her. Inirapan naman ito ni Ella.

"Palibhasa wala kang jowa." She scoffed at Rose.

Natawa na lang din ako sa dalawa. Charm worriedly eyed me. I bit my lower lip. The truth is, it's very easy to say that I just need to tell him what he needs to know. Reality sucks. It's really hard...big time.

"Just be honest on Liam, okay? I'm sure he'll understand." Ella added as if she had reflected something about her past actions.

Sinunod ko nga ang sinabi nila. I patiently waited on the red bench. Gusto pa sana nila akong samahan. I insisted not to.

Ang alam ko ay ala singko y medya ang labas ni Liam ngayon. It was around four thirty in the afternoon. Isang oras pa akong maghihintay kaya naman nakapagdesisyon ako na lumabas muna para kumain ng fishball.